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Concept Refinement Reviews
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spiro

 System Assembly
Average Rating
 
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1-marginal     2-ok    3-good     4-very good    5-outstanding

System assembly design and storyboard comments

Client 1:

comments provided on Annie Dai's review form
I think this experience will be fun. I think one of your greatest challenges will be integrating the wiring of the electromagnet into one of the ropes. When the rope goes in and out, that wire needs to move, but not get bunched up in the pulley on the wall. Think through that process a little bit, but I think what you plan to build looks like fun.


Client 2:

comments provided on Travis Libsack's review form
I think User Experience here is fun.

I have some concerns though with wiring of the electromagnet and also how the tentacles will be "sensed". Think though all the actions and reactions that the system has to input and output and make sure you have a plan!


Reviewer 3:

comments provided on Annie Dai's review form
I like the game a lot! Also, I can't find explicitly how you guys are going to sense that the players are colliding with the tentacles, but probably with some sort of force sensor, I am assuming (however, since the tentacles might be kinda big, it might be hard to sense all areas of the tentacle). Otherwise, I like the room design in general and the game seems like it would be fun!


Reviewer 4:

comments provided on Annie Dai's review form
A dungeon with a tentacled monster is very atmospheric! Having a well adds to the creepy ambience, and maneuvering the eggs is a fun team effort. There seems to be a mismatch between the story and the gameplay--if the players are helping the monster place the eggs back into the nests, why would the tentacles prevent the players from doing so? Maybe the players can be rescuing another mythical creature's eggs, and the walls can feature the creature?


Reviewer 5:

comments provided on Annie Dai's review form
Love the design and look of the game from the outside all the way to the approach of the cauldron. With some ominous sound effects theres a lot of potential to immerse the player in the theme. Only thing that's confusing is how each rope is attached to the egg, so that you're able to pick up one egg at a time and then release. Otherwise, very unique game.


Reviewer 6:

comments provided on Caralyn Cutlip's review form
Looks great--enjoyed the textures you applied to the renderings and storyboard. Everything makes sense and is well-illustrated.


Reviewer 7:

comments provided on Caralyn Cutlip's review form
The well is a really nice render and very detailed in terms of assembly and construction. Well done. It's there there is a very clear bill of materials and material rendering. The idea to give a surface treatment to the walls is nice. And the room concept is really innovative! Good work.


Reviewer 8:

comments provided on Elizabeth Mittmann's review form
i like the gameplay and storyline, but wish you showed more details to explain how you plan to make it this week.


Reviewer 9:

comments provided on Elizabeth Mittmann's review form
The Tentacle Dungeon storyboard explains the concept clearly. Spellcheck before submitting to not distract the readers from your story. It seems like the construction of the well is planned; however, there are inconsistencies between the room design and well model tab with respect to the shape of the well. Adding the clear screen at the top to restrict cheating, tampering and injury seems like a simple and elegant solution. I would like to better understand the controls, but that will likely be presented with future sketch models.


Reviewer 10:

comments provided on Elizabeth Mittmann's review form
Although I could not see the images from the storyboards, I'll try my best to critique based on your presentation and the text that I see!

To be honest, the description was enough to understand your concept, so good job on that! I think this is a great game that requires a lot of team work, mental skills, and physical skills. Pulling the egg into the nest is very intuitive. When the egg falls off of the "magnet" when the ropes hit the tentacles, it will be very clear to the user that the tentacles are off limits. The only thing I am concerned about is whether this game can be played with just two people maneuvering all 5 ropes. Are all 5 ropes needed to bring the egg to the right place? Can multiple ropes be controlled by one person? I think some testing sessions will be helpful in seeing whether these are feasible.


Reviewer 11:

comments provided on Elizabeth Mittmann's review form
Storyboard looks good! Having the people gave a good sense of scale, and I think the golden eggs are a good reward / incentive. Putting eggs into nests would be an intuitive objective.


Reviewer 12:

comments provided on Or Oppenheimer's review form
I think you guys can add more to the aesthetic of the room. Given the fact that the the eggs, baskets and claws are inside the well, you'll have more room and space in the room to use to make the room fit more within the theme.


Reviewer 13:

comments provided on Ryan Gulland's review form
As of 4/30 8pm, work has not been uploaded.


Reviewer 14:

comments provided on Ryan Gulland's review form
Although the storyboard images haven't been loading for me, I think the overall idea of your challenge is very cool from a physical and teamwork perspective. I think my only concern is that if you put the well in a corner of the room, it might feel a bit empty. Is there a way to make it more prevalent and fill the room with themed objects to enhance the experience?


Reviewer 15:

comments provided on Travis Libsack's review form
I love the mood that your storyboard creates. I am certain that users would really know exactly what to do, and I would also like a sense of urgency-are the eggs about to hatch/die if they don't get back into the nests?


Reviewer 16:

comments provided on Travis Libsack's review form
I have previously reviewed this storyboard, and I see that there has been a significant improvement in terms of clarity in the descriptions. I also like the fact the the water bowl has now been replaced with eggs. You could tether the eggs to a separate rope so that users cant take them.