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Concept Sketch Reviews
Home > Assignments > Concept sketch results > Reviews for Rachel Deghuee

Rachel Deghuee
team puzzled
[review]

StoryboardConcept Sketches
 Zodiac Jewels Ball Decoration Timer and Scoring Jewel Arcade Setup Presentation
Average Rating
 
Client 1:
Client 2:
Reviewer 3:
Reviewer 4:
Reviewer 5:
1-marginal     2-ok    3-good     4-very good    5-outstanding

Storyboard Zodiac Jewels: innovativeness and potential

Client 1:

I mean, Skee Ball is fun, but I'm not convinced that the game system can be effectively themed to look like it belongs in Ancient China. And while the jewels lighting up to show the team's score sort of makes sense, it doesn't make sense to pair that with the zodiac... a sheep is not inherently greater than a monkey, so there's no reason for a "sheep" score to be better than a "monkey" score etc. The only way I could see the Zodiac thing working is if there was some clue in the room that the team was specifically aiming for a certain zodiac with their score, so they need to hit it AND not go over it.

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Client 2:

This game has has been an arcade classic for many years, and could still be fun in a new setting, especially with added time pressure.

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Reviewer 3:

I like the idea of collaborative skee-ball, especially since the scoring and timing mechanisms seem intuitive even though they are unique. Giving teams of different sizes the ability to play and having a simple self-resetting mechanism both make this idea very believable as a real gag. It might be nice to add a simple twist to the skee-ball games somehow (maybe some of the holes detract points or players compete a bit some how) just to make the whole thing seem more novel.

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Reviewer 4:

I think this room has a lot of potential and fits your theme nicely. It also engages multiple players, which is key. The aesthetic of the room also has a lot of potential, which will make the user experience awesome!

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Reviewer 5:

I think this is an awesome idea! Skeeball is an activity that resonates with a lot of players, especially those who grew up in the U.S. playing arcade games. The activity requires everyone to participate, while also aligning their timing and being insightful about the overall objective.

The one worry I have is if the challenge is too difficult or complex to understand in a short timeframe.

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Potential, feasibility, user experience and human factors shown in the concept sketch, Ball Decoration

Client 1:

I like that the balls are decorated with Chinese patterns, but like I said, I don't see how the whole set-up, machines included, can be themed to look like Ancient China.

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Client 2:

This is a pretty neat looking ball. Having a custom ball would class up the game considerably and help to make this feel distinct from classic skee-ball.

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Reviewer 3:

I like the ball design a lot. The embossed design seems simple but definitely gives off a zodiac feel. It might be nice to add some novel element to the balls (maybe glowing lights or sound) just to spice things up. I don't think there should be any large issues making or buying designed balls for skee-ball, so think about how to get more creative with it!

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Reviewer 4:

I worry that some players might walk out with these balls. How would you prevent this from happening? I like that the balls are decorated like ancient Chinese coins because it adds to the aesthetic of the room. This ball would be really feasible to make. It might have been more useful to focus on a more complicated gag in the room like the Chinese Zodiac.

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Reviewer 5:

This makes sense, and it fits nicely with the theme. There is certainly potential to make it more complex or well-designed, but keeping it simple and relatable makes perfect sense.

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Potential, feasibility, user experience and human factors shown in the concept sketch, Timer and Scoring Jewel

Client 1:

Is Ancient China associated with jewels? I know they were big on jade, but I'm not sure about rubies and emeralds. I like that you're theming the lights so they don't just look like lights, but I'm not sure that rubies/emeralds are the right choice.

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Client 2:

This is a much more interesting way to show a timer and score than a screen or 7 segment display. Nice touch!

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Reviewer 3:

I really like this idea as a timing and scoring mechanism from a novel standpoint and feasibility. You can definitely use simple electronics and plastic pieces to execute on this idea, but consider how you would make the gems look believable and noticeable.

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Reviewer 4:

This jewel also adds to the aesthetic of the room which is good. This also seems really feasible to make (on its own and not considering the entire Chinese Zodiac) Again, I would have focused on a more complex gag.

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Reviewer 5:

Again, this makes sense and fits the theme. You could think of how to relate this more to zodiac signs and ancient Chinese culture, but I like the design and idea.

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Potential, feasibility, user experience and human factors shown in the concept sketch, Arcade Setup

Client 1:

This sketch helps me see how the machines will be oriented in the room. However, when I look at this, I just see Skee Ball machines... I don't see anything Chinese.

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Client 2:

It may be more fun to skip the standard plexiglas or netting and use a sensor to fail groups who attempt to walk up the ramps? Everyone knows you are not supposed to walk up these, but many will be tempted to try. It might be a fun "gotcha" moment to immediately fail a group that attempts to cheat.

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Reviewer 3:

Skee-ball machines are definitely a known gag, so it would be nice to see how you could spin this to look more zodiac-like for the theme and be more exciting/new. It also might nice to consider other arcade games that could accomplish a similar task of creating repeatable challenges for the players.

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Reviewer 4:

I would have appreciated more notes on the aesthetic of the machine or how it might work. I feel like this concept sketch did not give me a lot of information, considering that it's one of your most important gags. I am not sure that a ski-ball machine is feasible to make for this class, but you could always buy one (if the price is within the budget) and change its aesthetic. However I don't think changing the casing of an already existent product will be rewarding. It might be more rewarding to work on the Zodiac.

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Reviewer 5:

The machine setup is great, and follows a theme that has worked well for thousands of arcades around the world. It allows the great to be easily reset, while also providing effortless fun to any player.

I only wonder how the game will automatically know how many players are in the room?

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Sketching technique, clarity of storyboard and concept sketches, and their web presentation

Client 1:

Everything was really clear, except for the sketch that is captioned "Time's Up!" in the storyboard. I think that was just... something you scribbled out?

But thank you for captioning your pictures with typed text.

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Client 2:

This idea is communicated clearly. The storyboard contains a pretty full description of how the room will look and work.

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Reviewer 3:

Your website is very clear and well-laid out. Although the images are fairly simple and easy to see as-is, if you end up with more complex drawings in the future, you may want larger sketches/ pictures. For the storyboards and sketches, it might be useful to take a bit more time to make more refined drawings. I think the messiness of some of the drawings might detract from the viewer's experience (I'm also a bit confused by the greyed-out storyboard panel). Cleaning up the drawings will definitely elevate the sketches and storyboard and let you get more complex and ambitious with your visions!

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Reviewer 4:

Your website was easy to navigate, which is always appreciated. Your storyboard had a lot of notes which can be helpful, but I also think maybe adding more drawings rather than text would have made it easier to read. I didn't really understand your "Times Up!" drawing. You could have shown what the Zodiac looks like when time runs out or something more helpful than a black screen.

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Reviewer 5:

Overall, I really like the technique, clarity, and presentation. My only concern is that, given how many instructions and guidance are required for the storyboard, how will that translate to the game itself?

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