She put the pad on the hall table. She
began to go slowly upstairs, with her
hand on the
bannisters, as if she had left a party, where now this friend now
that had flashed back her face, her voice; had shut the door and gone
out and stood alone, a single figure against the appalling night, or
rather, to be accurate, against the stare of this matter-of-fact June
morning; soft with the glow of rose petals for some, she knew, and
felt it, as she paused by the open staircase window which let in
blinds flapping, dogs barking, let in, she thought, feeling herself
suddenly shrivelled, aged, breastless, the grinding, blowing,
flowering of the day, out of doors, out of the window, out of her
body and brain which now failed, since Lady Bruton, whose lunch
parties were said to be extraordinarily amusing, had not asked her.