There were Jorrocks’ Jaunts and Jollities; there were
Soapy Sponge and Mrs. Asquith’s Memoirs and Big Game
Shooting in Nigeria, all spread open. Ever so many books
there were; but none that seemed exactly right to take to Evelyn
Whitbread in her nursing home. Nothing that would serve to amuse her
and make that indescribably dried-up little woman look, as Clarissa
came in, just for a moment cordial; before they settled down for the
usual interminable talk of women’s ailments. How much she wanted
it-that people should look pleased as she came in, Clarissa thought
and turned and walked back towards Bond Street, annoyed, because it
was silly to have other reasons for doing things. Much rather would
she have been one of those people like Richard who did things for
themselves, whereas, she thought, waiting to cross, half the time she
did things not simply, not for themselves; but to make people think
this or that; perfect idiocy she knew (and now the policeman held up
his hand) for no one was ever for a second taken in. Oh if she could
have had her life over again! she thought, stepping on to the
pavement, could have looked even
differently!!