The 5th floor of the west parallel is logically named 5th West. While this name informs one of the high potential energy, and general space filling existence of the hall it does little to communicate the hall’s character. It would be a mouthful to refer to our hall as “scooterton - catshire - roofdancingchester - burninatewithburnythingtown - moviefestgorod - amazingville” all the time so we’ve put together this website to give you a good idea about our hall without taxing your tongue muscles [which need strength to participate in other activities].
On 5th West we really like cats – we currently have the highest cat to student ratio in all of East Campus. The cats are a part of the hall and can be found meandering in rooms, lounges and the kitchen. In said kitchen we like to cook, and we also like to eat. Every week we have Hall Feed, which is like a town meeting with dinner – during which we discuss things like when we are going to have parties, what sorts of hall trips we are going to take, how many water balloons we can launch at the sad chemistry grad students across the Dot in building 18, and what new murals we want painted on our walls.
As well as liking cats, 5westers also like other 5westers [which is handy since we live together, in close proximity to sharp objects]. At anytime of any 24 hour period there are people on hall who are hanging out, playing video games, going out to Boston, going to dinner, baking cake, eating cake, watching tv, drawing on the walls, sitting outside their doors and laughing together, scooter racing, star gazing, writing screenplays, doing physics, perfecting plans for world domination, going for a run, riding in shopping carts, playing IM sports, hugging trees, being a code monkey, building devices to instantly cool cans of warm soda, being premed, practicing musical instruments, drinking coffee, oh yeah, and we do psets too. You will not find people smoking on our hall [carcinogen is derived from a Greek word meaning “put down yer damn cigarette”]. And you will not find nude people in Monroe or Hayden.
Like any good community the thing that makes 5th West a great place to live is the people inhabiting the place. We all come from different backgrounds, representing a variety of different courses, geographic regions and philosophies. I did not live on 5th West as a freshman, and I was surprised by how accepting and kind everyone on the hall was to me when I first moved in – they made me feel at home – which is exactly how one should feel in one’s dorm.
I’m sure you’ll agree that is quite enough sentiment to handle in one sitting, so I’m going to conclude now and you can pretend I made a dramatic segue here if you like. This has gotten rather long and I still feel like there’s more to say. Now that you have a ramble-y, vague, borderline-sappy introduction to 5th West you might want to come find out what the hell I’m going on about. If so you can shed the mere semblance of reality that is the internet and come visit us in person! As the name implies – 5th floor, West parallel, EAsT camPUS.
C. Kiersten Pollard
5th West resident rambler, and hall expert on subdural hematomas.