The escape pod slowly phased back into reality, and then dropped with a crunch onto a surface a few feet below. Inside, Arthur and Ford rubbed their new bruises before checking the atmosphere, finding it surprisingly breathable, opening the capsule's hatch, and stepping out to find that they had materialized inside another spaceship. So astounded were they by this knowledge that they failed to notice the occupant of that spaceship who was currently resting in a heap underneath their escape capsule.

"Ford," asked Arthur, "what about the others?"

"Arthur," Ford replied sternly "you'll have to learn, it's a convention in all space-travelling species that if you have to ditch someone - you know, a friend - and there's nothing you can do, you just let it be, you don't talk about them, okay?" He paused. "And then you get blind drunk about them later."

"I think there must be something terribly wrong with the universe, you know?"

"I think there must be something terribly wrong with this ship." Ford had finally taken a look around the chamber. The first thing that struck his eye had been what appeared to be a coffin. The next four thousand nine-hundred and ninety-nine things that struck his eyes also appeared to be coffins. "The place if full of sarcophagi as far as the eye can see... Wild."

"What's so great about dead people?

"Dunno. Let's have a look." The coffins stood about waist high and were constructed of what appeared to be white marble, which is almost certainly what it was - something that only appeared to be white marble. The tops were semitranslucent, and through them could dimly be perceived the features of their late and presumably lamented occupants. Rolling slowly round the floor between the sarcophagi was a heavy, oily white gas which Arthur at first thought might be there to give the place a little atmosphere until he discovered that it also froze his ankles. The sarcophagi too were intensely cold to the touch. Ford crouched next to one and wiped the frost from a plaque near its base. "It says 'Golgafrinchan Ark Fleet, Ship B, Hold 7, Telephone Sanitizer Second Class' - and a serial number."

"A telephone sanitizer?" said Arthur. "A dead telephone sanitizer?"

"Best kind."

"But what's he doing here?"

"Not a lot. Much like this hairdresser." Ford had moved to the next sarcophagus, and a moment's brisk towel work had revealed a similar plaque. The next sarcophagus revealed itself to be the last resting place of an advertizing account executive. The one after that contained a secondhand car salesman, third class. "Why would someone go to all the trouble and expense of carting five thousand dead bodies through space?"

"Ten thousand," said Arthur, pointing to the archway through which the next chamber was dimly visible."

"Fifteen million," said a voice.

"That's a lot," said Ford. "A lot a lot."

"Turn around slowly," barked the voice, "and put your hands up. Any other move and I blast you into tiny tiny bits."

"Hello?" said Ford, turning round slowly, putting his hands up and faced the man who was silhouetted in the doorway waving a long silver Kill-O-Zap gun.

"Why," said Arthur Dent, "isn't anyone ever pleased to see us?"

As if to make it clear that it too wasn't pleased to see them, the ship suddenly rocked as if under an impact. In all corners of the room flashing red lights made their presence known, which could've been assumed to be the signal for the start of a wild party were it not for the whooping sirens which accompanied them. Arthur, Ford, and their mysterious assailant wobbled on their feet and then stood confused as the intercom crackled into life.

"Hi there! This is Eddie, your shipboard computer here on the B Ark. I could've sworn that wasn't the ship I was on a minute ago. I don't think it was the ship now docked with our starboard airlock, though. It does seem somewhat strange that there's another ship parked through the computer core. It does look somewhat familiar. Hmm...

"Anyway, I'm sure that's not important. I just thought everyone might like to know that my readouts indicate that we are now on a direct course for the small blue-green planet now visible through the forward viewscreens, where we will be making a crash landing in approximately six hours. Estimated survival rate is 0%. If you look out of the left portholes you can see a beautiful view of a few gas giants as we pass, and in a few hours we will be passing through an asteroid belt which will be available on all sides for your viewing pleasure.

"Oh, and a few of the cryo-units in freezer-bay 3 have now completed their wakeup cycles so you'll all have a little more company. I wouldn't want you to be lonely, after all. Share and enjoy."

Interested? Send me some mail and I'll be sure you get an application when the game is ready to run.

If you have any special requests for what you'd like to play in the game, now would be the time to let me know. Just drop me some mail and I'll see what I can do about including your request in the game as it gets written. I'll certanly accept preapps like "I want to play Zaphod Beeblebrox," and I'll do my best, but keep in mind that not everyone can play Zaphod Beeblebrox (even if he does have two heads). Preapps like "I want to play a shapechanging alien who has disguised himself as Zaphod Beeblebrox and is now attempting to locate my arch rival who I need to kidnap in order to steal his nosehair to use in my device to cure the common cold," (or at least something with that level of detail and uniquenes) are much more likely to intrigue me and be worked into game, at least if they fit the genre and style properly. Submitting a preapp, of course, is no guarantee that I'll put your ideas into the game, or even that you'll get to play the resulting part if I do (though I'll do my best).