Gullibility Virus!
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WARNING, CAUTION, DANGER, AND BEWARE!
Gullibility Virus Spreading over the Internet!
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WASHINGTON, D.C.--The Institute for the Investigation of Irregular
Internet Phenomena announced today that many Internet users are becoming
infected by a new virus that causes them to believe without question
every groundless story, legend, and dire warning that shows up in their
In Box or on their browser.
The Gullibility Virus, as it is called, apparently makes people
believe and forward copies of silly hoaxes relating to cookie recipes,
E-Mail viruses, taxes on modems, postcards for child cancer research and
the merits of melanza.
"These are not just readers of tabloids or people who buy lottery
tickets based on fortune cookie numbers," a spokesman said. "Most are
otherwise normal people, who would laugh at the same stories if told to
them by a stranger on a street corner." However, once these same people
become infected with the Gullibility Virus, they believe anything they
read on the Internet.
"My immunity to tall tales and bizarre claims is all gone," reported
one weeping victim. "I believe every warning message and sick child
story my friends forward to me, even though most of the messages are
anonymous."
Another victim, now in remission, added, "When I first heard about
Good Times, I just accepted it without question. After all, there were
dozens of other recipients on the mail header, so I thought the virus
must be true." It was a long time, the victim said, before she could
stand up at a Hoaxes Anonymous meeting and state, "My name is Jane, and
I've been hoaxed." Now, however, she is spreading the word. "Challenge
and check whatever you read," she says.
Internet users are urged to examine themselves for symptoms of the
virus, which include the following:
- the willingness to believe improbable stories without thinking
- the urge to forward multiple copies of such stories to others
- a lack of desire to take three minutes to check to see if a story
is true
T. C. is an example of someone recently infected. He told one
reporter, "I read on the Net that the major ingredient in almost all
shampoos makes your hair fall out, so I've stopped using shampoo." When
told about the Gullibility Virus, T. C. said he would stop reading
e-mail, so that he would not become infected.
Anyone with symptoms like these is urged to seek help
immediately. Experts recommend that at the first feelings of
gullibility, Internet users rush to their favorite search engine and
look up the item tempting them to thoughtless credence. Most hoaxes,
legends, and tall tales have been widely discussed and exposed by the
Internet community.
Courses in critical thinking are also widely available, and there is
online help from many sources, including
Those people who are still symptom free can help inoculate themselves
against the Gullibility Virus by reading some good material on
evaluating sources, such as
Lastly, as a public service, Internet users can help stamp out the
Gullibility Virus by sending copies of this message to anyone who
forwards them a hoax.
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This message is so important, we're sending it anonymously!
Forward it to all your friends right away! Don't think
about it! This is not a chain letter! This story is true!
Don't check it out! This story is so timely, there is no
date on it! This story is so important, we're using lots
of exclamation points! For every message you forward to
some unsuspecting person, the Home for the Hopelessly
Gullible will donate ten cents to itself. (If you wonder
how the Home will know you are forwarding these messages
all over creation, you're obviously thinking too much.)
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ACT NOW! DON'T DELAY! LIMITED TIME! NOT SOLD IN ANY STORE!
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