More Light!

} How many Freemasons does it take to change a lightbulb?
} That's a craft secret.

September: Upon arriving at the lodge, the Master notices the bulb is burnt out. He asks the Electrician to replace it. The Electrician tells him that bulbs are kept in the Tyler's desk. The Master goes to the Tyler's desk but finds no bulbs. The Tyler tells him that the lodge has been out of lightbulbs since Rt. Wor. Barney was Master (sometime during the Eisenhower years). During the business meeting, the Master proposes the purchase of a box of lightbulbs. Three Past Masters object, saying that the motion must be printed in the notice of the next communication. The Secretary concurs.

October: The Master calls for the ballot. The three Past Masters object, and ask for a Treasurer's report on whether the lodge can afford the purchase. The Treasurer hasn't got his books at the communication, so the ballot is postponed until the following month.

November: The Master calls up the motion, and calls for the Treasurer's report. The Treasurer reports that the lodge has sufficient funds for the proposed purchase. The Master calls for the ballot, and the motion to obtain new bulbs is passed. The Master asks if one of the three Past Masters would be willing to purchase the bulbs, but all three have already gone downstairs to "assist" the Dinner Committee. The Electrician volunteers to purchase the bulbs, and is escorted once around the lodge to the applause of the brethren.

December: the Master opens the lodge and notices that the bulb is still burnt out. He asks the Treasurer and finds out that the Electrician left for Florida the day after the previous meeting, but will be back for the May communication. The Master calls the lodge to recess, gets back in his car, drives to a hardware store, buys a pack of bulbs, drives back, parks, goes in, drags his chair underneath the burnt-out bulb, replaces the bulb, throws the old bulb away, drags his chair back to the East and calls the Craft back to order.

So... how many Freemasons does it take to change a lightbulb? One. You just have to ask the right one.