Kathleen: [vulcan voice] Clothes are not ... logical.

Karen: We weren't dating anymore, so I made him take his socks off.
James: Well, at least you kept your dignity.

James: Wait, so you have a sister named Caroline...and the first thing you do
when you get to college...is sleep with all the girls named Caroline?
Fred: For the record, I thought it was fucked up too.

Karen: I have a confession to make. I worked on SIPB shit instead of showering.
Kathleen: YOU'RE TURNING INTO A TWINKIE!
Karen: At least I'm not alternately playing Nethack and writing a tenday.
Kathleen: Hey, I have a rich and fulfilling life! I also have an Internet boyfriend.

[yelled in the student center]
James: FUCK IT! I don't want to eat, I just want to do recreational drugs.

[referring to a hypothetical threesome between Karen, Sergei's mom, and James's mom]
James: Yeah, My mom would totally win.

Karen: God, the freshman are so eager to be the first to lose their virginity, it's hilarious.
Donald: Man, how times change. I remember last year, I was super excited to be the first freshman to become a SIPB member!
Karen: ...
Donald: ...I guess I had already lost my virginity, so it was kind of ok...

Katleen: I have nothing against people with Vaginas and paired X chromosomes, I just wish they wouldn't be such WOMEN.