SPAM Haiku 10601-10700

Move backwards to Numbers 10501-10600.

10601.
Pork philosophy
See life through a lens of SPAM
More truth than you know

--Cholesterol 300

10602.
"I love you," she said
Then went to fridge and saw SPAM
"Goodbye, forever"

--Cholesterol 300

10603.
An anachronism
Greasy pork in a tin can
Oldie but goodie

--Cholesterol 300

10604.
Vacuum-stayed decay
SPAM: to the earth's four corners
Meat missionary

--Cholesterol 300

10605.
I dreamed of riches
Fresh caviar and champagne
Ended up with SPAM

--Cholesterol 300

10606.
Designer color
SPAM: fashionable pink shade
Latest rage, trendy!

--Cholesterol 300

10607.
Bomb Saddam with pork
Better than gas, planes, or nukes
SPAM: stronger than SCUD

--Cholesterol 300

10608.
Sure-fire fund raiser
Tired of little brown cookies
Why not Girl Scout SPAM?

--Cholesterol 300

10609.
Sensory weirdness
SPAM: glistening soft and pink
An unsettling sight

--Cholesterol 300

10610.
Sick joke? Low Fat SPAM?
When fat is gone, what is left?
Selling empty cans?

--Cholesterol 300

10611.
At the ice forum
SPAM was all I had to give
They needed a puck

--Ryan the Beeky, rwkspecial@aol.com

10612.
Bologna bakeoff
The best in the world compete
I threw in some SPAM

--Ryan the Beeky, rwkspecial@aol.com

10613.
Time to pull the plug:
The e-mail addresses are
Better than the verse.

--Geoff Holme, Stan Byer-Mann@TAM_E_Y.net

10614.
Scrumptious, supple flesh
Oh, glistening corpulence!
We shall meet again...

--K-Dog, www.dot.dot.dot.w.dot.w.dave.com

10615.
Alabama SPAM.
Delicacy, "Mighty good
Eatin'," Daddy said.

--eddie erdmann, bluekid923@aol.com

10616.
Fry it Mama, fry.
Potted meat: no longer king.
SPAM has won my heart.

--eddie erdmann, bluekid923@aol.com

10617.
Wicked pink fusion
brings to mind a new meaning
to bad storm rising.

--Terry Montague, trmont@seanet.com

10618.
Spread Spam spongy specks
On front lawn, fertilizer
Why no one visits?

--Terry Montague, trmont@seanet.com

10619.
What to drink with SPAM?
Maybe a light pink chablis?
Toast with Thunderbird

--Terry Montague, trmont@seanet.com

10620.
pig toes and pig nose,
pig butts and pig guts in cans,
let's just call it "SPAM"

--John Charles Webb, Jr., johnboy@aloha.net

10621.
porky pig is SPAM
curly tail is in the can
get key, throw away

--John Charles Webb, Jr., johnboy@aloha.net

10622.
If SPAM is canned ham,
why is there SPAM in my ram?
One mouse is enough.

--John Charles Webb, Jr., johnboy@aloha.net

10623.
Wiggly pseudo-flesh
Oozing mucous-like jelly
Slides down easily

--Trout catcher, gdouglas@reputable.com

10624.
SPAM sponsors NASCAR
Two hundred five miles per hour
Flying blue SPAM tin

--Trout catcher, gdouglas@reputable.com

10625.
Used to be a key
Now dysfunctional pull tab
Finger dripping blood

--Trout catcher, gdouglas@reputable.com

10626.
SPAM, mighty warrior.
Riding on your steed of pink,
face of death to all!

--Coz

10627.
boulder on hillside
a SPAM can in my cupboard
I will move neither

--Gerard Dolan, delaco@pobox.com

10628.
"spam (n), Junk email"
- The Oxford Dictionary
True English word now.

--Jim Rugh, rugh@hotmail.com

10629.
Not bacon nor ham
It's nothing resembling beef
Just pink meat in goo

--Brad Smith, brsmithjr@hotmail.com

10630.
Harken back to days
Where tin cans of hot pink flesh
Were legal tender

--brad Smith, brsmithjr@hotmail.com

10631.
Heroin and crack
Pale in their addictiveness
To flesh in a can

--Brad Smith, brsmithjr@hotmail.com

10632.
Here I go again!
Thought I was done with Spamku,
Guess I'm addicted.

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10633.
President Clinton.
Punishment for him should be,
Can of SPAM each meal!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10634.
I work for Rhodes Bread.
Recipe for a great treat--
SPAM between Rhodes Rolls!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10635.
SPAM and Lewinsky.
They have a lot in common!
Full of fat and grease!

--Anonymous

10636.
Salty pink cubed treat.
Makes my mouth water so much.
Is it lunchtime yet?

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10637.
About to lose job!
Nothing's getting done today.
Thinking of Spamku.

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10638.
Twist the metal key
Free the oblong of joy meat
Ecstasy of lard

--Anonymous

10639.
The pinkness of SPAM
Jiggles and delights my cat
Need a new hobby

--Aum and Dublin

10640.
Analysis of
The stain on Monica's dress
Showed it to be SPAM.

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10641.
"Damn!" said Hillary,
"Where did Bill put the spiced pork?"
The grand jury knows!

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10642.
Marine field rations
Remain faithful to Hormel...
Spamper Fidelis!

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10643.
Hormela One car,
With double-overhead spams,
Slides around the track.

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10644.
There's a happy tune
Pigs sing to the harvest moon;
They call it SPAM's song.

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10645.
All around the Globe
Cheers like redundant SPAMku
Barnicled has-beens

--Howie Barnicle, GCarlin@sprintnet.not

10646.
You don't understand
Drinking and writing DO mix
Spamaholically

--Global Spam, Barnicle@want.Advertiser

10647.
Imus in the morn
It's another diaper lump
Of petrified SPAM!

--Y. Bother, HowieKaka@john.com

10648.
Bubba Bill Clinton
We're all standing behind you
Bend over and....SPAM!

--We're all behind you Bill.....Soooo...., Ben Dover

10649.
Wag The Dog all right
We know where YOUR pork belongs
In the SPAM can Bill

--Capt. SPAMERICA, and what did you do Billy Boy, Billy Boy?

10650.
More SPAM for the mill......
"Looks Like Lewinsky Blew It"
Look ma, no hands!.....Bill

--Capt. SPAMERICA, The Canned Crusader

10651.
"We've got to drop this!"
Bill was overheard to say
With his SPAM exposed

--Ankle Deep, In Spam

10652.
Dick Nixon said it
Mike Barnicle said it, too
But SPAM is just SPAM

--Spam Droppings, Mike Bar Nickle

10653.
Hippy Dippy Mike
Got "Lewinskied," "Spammed," and "canned"
Now writes graffiti

--Spam Droppings, Mike Bar Nickle

10654.
SPAM is really cool.
And you get the magic key.
We should set it free.

--Anonymous

10655.
Presidential SPAM......
Monica's the humidor
For Bubba's White Owl.

--Cigars , If you got 'em, smoke 'em

10656.
Love you Monica,
You're a nineties kind of broad.
Say, do you eat SPAM?

--My Gal Monica, You go girl!

10657.
Grand jury transcript:
SPAM breath made his dick go limp.
That's why he's so mad.

--Junkyard God

10658.
Ate SPAM together.
Improper relationship,
but there was no sex.

--Junkyard God

10659.
After sharing some
SPAM in the Oval Office
She fucked a cigar

--Junkyard God

10660.
Nibble a pink loaf
Then inhale a moist Cuban.
Arafat can wait.

--Junkyard God

10661.
Monica, cigar,
we can forgive. But not SPAM.
Impeachment hearings!

--Junkyard God

10662.
SPAM for everyone.
Heat can before opening.
SPAM is everywhere!

--Lee Malone, leemalone@aol.com

10663.
To eat or not to?
That is sure a no brainer!
SPAM is disgusting!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10664.
Mom pulls out blue can.
Says, "Look kids, it's dinnertime!"
Kids eat dog instead.

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10665.
Normally happy,
This year's Christmas morning sucked!
Stockings filled with SPAM!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10666.
Prissy pink piglet
I wonder did you wiglet
When they sealed the lid

--KEVIN WALKER, magnison@aol.com

10667.
Little orphaned pigs
Crammed into a can and sealed
Never to be loved

--KEVIN WALKER, magnison@aol.com

10668.
It falls to the ground
"Pink elephant poop?" I asked...
......If the truth were known.....

--KEVIN WALKER, magnison@aol.com

10669.
Hormel's great sin--SPAM
All who eat it are punished
They go through Hormhell

--KEVIN WALKER, magnison@aol.com

10670.
Tastes good on the ground
I eat but why is it warm?
Pink elephants sigh

--Kevin Walker, Magnison@ aol.com

10671.
sun sets on trout stream;
hurriedly tie on new fly.
SPAM awaits at camp...

--Walldaddy, wallismatt@hotmail.com

10672.
Twist on Murphy's Law:
If anything can go bad,
My bet's on the SPAM.

--Walldaddy, wallismatt@hotmail.com

10673.
Save your stomach friend
Swallow not this gelled pink flesh
Flush it directly

--Ricosan

10674.
I just eat my SPAM
with SPAM, SPAM, more SPAM, and SPAM
and for desert: SPAM.

--Eric Idle, Idle@python.com

10675.
Shari Lewis, dead.
Never followed through on first
Idea: SPAM Chop.

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10676.
Lab results are in
on Monica's pink dress stain.
Need I tell you more?

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10677.
Khartoum officials
cry, "Bombed lab only made SPAM!"
Nuke it, just in case.

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10678.
Hormel follow-up
Team scrapes walls of Afghan caves.
"Bin Laden flavor."

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10679.
Bill: "Afghanistan
and Sudan first. Starr persists?
Minnesota next."

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10680.
Hillary, loyal
Wife, prepares SPAM lunch for Prez.
No more porked interns.

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10681.
It's quite a wonder
People choose to eat this meat
That's worse than tofu

--The Sheep

10682.
The thing about SPAM:
Everybody's heard of it
But few dare try it

--Craig Beresford, crbdmsb@gateway.net

10683.
SPAM on Yom Kippur
Isn't so bad after all
For spam is not food

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10684.
From light to darkness
From mere food to nuclear waste
SPAM transforms cosmos

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10685.
SPAM is edible
Two added to two makes five
Ministry of Truth

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10686.
Channel force of SPAM
Tap the dark power of pork
Adept of Despair

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10687.
Reincarnation
That tin of SPAM might contain
Adolf Hitler's soul

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10688.
Each atom of SPAM
Born in supernova's heart
A STAR DIED FOR THIS?

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10689.
Lager, SPAM, and whelks
Suitable Skinhead diet
Fuel for hooligans

--Spud Ronin, spudr@hotmail.com

10690.
Hammer and anvil.
A million points of SPAM-Lite
The key was broken

--Neil M., enzo@outwest.net

10691.
Doorway to my soul.
The doorway to my rectum.
The key opens all.

--Neil M., enzo@outwest.net

10692.
SPAM is an awful,
Gelatinous, glutinous
Block of pig's offal.

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10693.
"Oh! SPAM! Canned you see."
National anathema
Of the porcine race.

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10694.
Do not jump on SPAM.
Dense matter. High pressure. Pink
singularity.

--Neil M., enzo@outwest.net

10695.
My pink wedding dress
Hangs in the closet like SPAM
He was such a pig

--Teaberry10@aol.com

10696.
I popped it open
The vapors started smokin'
So I fed the cat

--okdopey@aol.com

10697.
With Texture so Fine
And a Smell that's so Divine
SPAM, you are all Mine

--Cameron Farah

10698.
Pink is for sissies!
A real man takes his SPAM black--
Add logs to the fire.

--Greg Adams, BeeReb@sprynet.com

10699.
We have a death wish:
Our mausoleum is built
pink brick by pink brick.

--Erin Adams, BeeReb@sprynet.com

10700.
Pink mass in my ass:
Certainly it's SPAM, I say...
But where's my gerbil?

--Greg Adams, BeeReb@sprynet.com