SPAM Haiku 16201-16300

Move backwards to Numbers 16101-16200.


16201.
SPAM is not Kosher.
Can't put it in your tzimmes.
Tough being Jewish.
--Gregg Homer, ghomer@pacbell.net

16202.
Staring at my SPAM.
I see it move and then shake.
It must have a soul.

--Gregg Homer, ghomer@pacbell.net

16203.
Panamanian
wife asks: "What is this pink stuff?"
"American born."

--SPAMamanian

16204.
Fran bought SPAM cookbook.
Made five recipes one night.
Family found dead.

--Gregg Homer, ghomer@entlawgroup.com

16205.
At the trailer park,
Buck put Cheez Whiz on his SPAM.
Buck found God that night.

--Gregg Homer, ghomer@entlawgroup.com

16206.
If someone kills you,
You reincarnate as SPAM
To avenge your death.

--Gregg Homer, ghomer@entlawgroup.com

16207.
Too much time on hands.
So started writing SPAM-ku.
Wife says, "Get a job."

--Gregg Homer, ghomer@entlawgroup.com

16208.
Fry it, scramble it,
Or even fricassee it,
But never eat it.

--Gregg Homer, ghomer@entlawgroup.com

16209.
pinochle lady
blinking to each falling coin
reflecting in pan

--Michael, mbox611@yahoo.com

16210.
SPAM.....Offal......Awful.
How can homonyms have the
same exact meaning??

--Floater, Loving_Life@The_Boneyard.com

16211.
Big Power Failure.
EON/NIF lights goes ON/OFF.
SPAM in the circuit.

--Floater, Loving_Life@The_Boneyard.com

16212.
NIF up...down...up....down....
Like pushups and exercise.
SPAM Lite health program.

--Floater, Loving_Life@The_Boneyard.com

16213.
Power Disabled
Light is a transparent act:
like glistening gel.

--Floater, Loving_Life@The_Boneyard.com

16214.
Four more weeks have passed.
As for my Added Value:
other pigs give more.

--Floater, Loving_Life@The_Boneyard.com

16215.
Program MisManage-
ment Review next week will be
SPAM personified!!!

--Floater, Loving_Life@The_Boneyard.com

16216.
PMR report:
incredibly LOUD squealing!!!
Auditory Pain!!!

--Floater, Loving_Life@The_Boneyard.com

16217.
Prepare briefing charts
to justify the many
heads......and snouts, lips, ears.

--Floater, Loving_Life@The_Boneyard.com

16218.
Nothing accomplished.
Zero self-respect is earned.
SPAM is more useful.

--Floater, Loving_Life@The_Boneyard.com

16219.
Existence pre-SPAM
Cretin, moron, idiot
Now more enlightened

--Dan S., pcr_clock at somewhere dot com

16220.
In Waterworld film
Trademark infringement of SPAM
Called it SMEAT instead

--Dan S., pcr_clock at somewhere dot com

16221.
Heat oil in a pan
Slice the SPAM and toss it in
Cholest'rol patties

--Harry, hlmorgan@usd497.org

16222.
With a pocket knife
and SPAM loaf, MacGuyver carves
a new heart for Sue.

--Fozzie

16223.
I may wear a SPAM
hat, but it is my SPAM hat,
and I shall not change.

--Fozzie

16224.
When I eat SPAM, pigs
suffer. But when I DON'T eat
SPAM, Hormel suffers.

--Fozzie

16225.
The goblin yelled "Trick
or treat!" The can of SPAM I
dropped punctured her bag.

--Scott Smith, ssmith@us.edu

16226.
what's up with the SPAM?
beautiful vomitous mass
various pig bits

--andrew sbanotto, master author of SPAMku

16227.
Shrieking pigs boiled live
Reduced to glistening pink
Porkophiliac

--SPAMeron

16228.
Pink porcine essence
Glistens, beckoning to me
SPAM is all in all

--SPAMeron

16229.
Eating SPAM daily
My arteries obstructed
Permanent repose

--SPAMeron

16230.
In the bright meadow
Two naked sweaty people
SPAM has that effect

--SPAMeron

16231.
Hormel and Pink Floyd
Released the early single
"Point Me at the SPAM"

--SPAMeron

16232.
Pink Floyd in Blue Can
Another Brick in the Wall
Comfortably Numb

--SPAMeron

16233.
"Taming of the SPAM"
(Was this set in Paducah?)
By William ShakeSPAM

--SPAMeron

16234.
Hybrid utensil
Nefarious luncheon meat
This is SPORK and SPAM

--SPAMeron

16235.
Dusty on the shelf
Pink bits in a blue can sit
Thinking happy thoughts

--SPAMeron

16236.
Pink, shiny wetness
Compacted porcine product
The joy that is SPAM

--SPAMeron

16237.
With a jug of wine
And a loaf of bread and thou
I still miss my SPAM

--SPAMeron

16238.
Words coined by Shakespeare
Anachronistic verbiage
SPAM not included

--SPAMeron

16239.
My brother submits
SPAMku in an attempt to
express his true self.

--Fozzie

16240.
Is it true that we
may see ourselves reflected
in pooled SPAM juice? Yes.

--Fozzie, Mark.Foster@azwebmail.midwestern.edu

16241.
Texture: wet, soft, pink.
Forbidden like the apple.
Man-made, demon food.

--Aaron Ehlers, asehlers@hotmail.com

16242.
Colonel Kurtz in hut
Stomach engorged with pink meat
SPAMpocalypse Now.

--bms

16243.
Went to store for food.
Noticed SPAM across the aisle.
I kept on walking.

--Aaron Ehlers, asehlers@hotmail.com

16244.
An untrained person
SPAMateur psychologist
Tries to understand

--SPAMeron

16245.
The thief Jean Valjean
Hero of Les Miserables
Stole a can of SPAM

--SPAMeron

16246.
Once upon a time
A girl with long pink tresses
Lovely SPAMpunzel

--SPAMeron

16247.
Tiny little pig
No bigger than a thimble
Our SPAMbelina

--SPAMeron

16248.
No miller's daughter
Could spin straw into canned pork
Where's SPAMpelstiltskin?

--SPAMeron

16249.
Monster pig farms came.
Price per pig plummeted and
small farms went bankrupt.

--Milford Pigboy

16250.
Consumers will not
see lower SPAM prices but
enhanced pig profits.

--Milford Pigboy

16251.
Hog barns and manure
lagoons are not the only
things that stink like that!

--Milford Pigboy

16252.
Romantic drama
Puzzling and enigmatic
Shakespeare's "SPAMbeline"

--SPAMeron

16253.
Savor every SPAM
particle; every viscous
drop of SPAM liquid.

--Milford Pigboy

16254.
Let us now begin.
We lift our hearts to give thanks
for all our SPAMTalk.

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16255.
House System blows out.
NavCal incident headache.
SPAMHead unplugged it!!!

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16256.
I love to see the
brain trust in action as they
avoid the knife slash.

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16257.
Blue can, blue jacket.
Pigs in the can, employee
in jacket. Good Match!!

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16258.
Humiliation.
How much more should I absorb
to slurp SPAMGravy??

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16259.
Inactivity
Report each week fills the blue
can with yet more lies.

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16260.
Palatable SPAM??
Yes!! Better than the Boneyard.
I loathe this palace.

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16261.
My parents fed me
SPAM. Little did they know it
would be my career.

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16262.
CDR this week:
bagels for the engineers,
SPAM on briefing charts.

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16263.
SPAM here really means:
very Stoo-Pid And Mindless
non-activities.

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16264.
Tongues talk in blue can.
Blue-shirt's tongue is flapping but
he is not "talking."

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16265.
Halloween taste treat.
Love the flavor on a Ritz:
SPAM hors d'oeuvres today.

--Philosopher, still@The_Boneyard.com

16266.
The blank page assaults
My gravy slurping, fogged brain....
Pumpkin SPAM for brains.

--Tim, also_still@The_Boneyard.com

16267.
He is a loser.
Bet he counts on his fingers
When making SPAMKU!!!

--Tim, witty@The_Boneyard.com

16268.
In Dubya's country:
kids beg for SPAM; adults in
unemployment lines.

--Milford Pigboy

16269.
"You want MORE?" ask the
Rs; "Ketchup is vegetable
to go with your SPAM."

--Milford Pigboy

16270.
A disgusting "slfwopsh"
followed by a morbid "thud."
The SPAM emerges.

--Stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16271.
SPAM suffocation,
pink sludge comes from his nostrils.
The hate crime was done.

--Stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16272.
a trail of vomit
spattered with shards of pink meat,
Sam ate SPAM again!

--stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16273.
a dank grimy pipe
belches clouds of smoke and meat
Hormel giving birth!

--Anonymous

16274.
The pink plug of meat
is a blur when it is struck.
Why eat? Play SPAM-ball.

--stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16275.
Her gut sprayed his tux
with frothy pink residue--
pre-prom SPAM milkshake.

--stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16276.
Who can stomach SPAM?
Our stomachs quiver almost
as much as the meat!

--stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16277.
As one gazes at
those folds of putrid jelly
one thinks "what died here"?

--stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16278.
cherry blossoms fall
as I sit beneath the tree
chowing down on SPAM

--Chuck Beard

16279.
poor man's suppertime
nothing but SPAM in cupboard
now I have heartburn

--Chuck Beard

16280.
does SPAM cause heartburn
from sodium igniting
on contact with flesh?

--Chuck Beard

16281.
The falcon dove at
break-neck speed and snatched the SPAM
loaf in its talons.

--Fozzie

16282.
SPAM or peach Jell-O
Which is which? I cannot tell.
The stench clues me in.

--Stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16283.
An orb of gristle
and pig nuts fall to the earth.
A SPAM "meateor."

--stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16284.
Another trail of
vomit through Hormel's lobby.
A taste tester quits.

--stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16285.
Has brains (not his pigs),
never tasted SPAM, not once.
Hormel's C.E.O.

--stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16286.
Something struck Sue's car,
a bouncing pink projectile.
SPAM road rage is real!

--Stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16287.
A kid is writhing.
Another ER visit.
Mom made SPAM Chili!

--Stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16288.
The world first sees SPAM
in nineteen thirty-seven.
SPAM, this is the world.

--Merlin, Bryan.Lagos@axcelis.com

16289.
I will not eat it!
SPAM is an acronym that
stands for "spit and ham!"

--Mark Rand, markrand@aol.com

16290.
i think that i shall
never see a poem as
beautiful as spam.....

--paul harris, iamthebatman@hotmail.com

16291.
a car made of SPAM?
would it still have new car smell?
Dodge trucks are SPAM tough.....

--paul harris, iamthebatman@hotmail.com

16292.
SPAM piling upwards
Scattered around the ceiling
Falling in your mouth

--Arun Gurung, arun.gurung@online.no

16293.
Thousands of pig parts
pressed through grimy pipes and valves.
SPAM bricklets for all!

--stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16294.
Is that a liver
or a sphincter or an eye?
SPAM connect the dots.

--stephanos, stedojo@yahoo.com

16295.
SPAM induced music
World's greatest selling album
Pink Side of the Moon

--SPAMeron

16296.
Must vote for someone
Eat SPAM for inspiration
Voted for Al Gore

--xiphoid

16297.
End of good times. We
dine on cold SPAM slices served
on best china plates.

--Milford Pigboy

16298.
Job on large pig farm,
in Dubya's America,
is in your future.

--Milford Pigboy

16299.
Wipe dust bunnies off
Y2K SPAM stocks; Voodoo
Economics II.

--Milford Pigboy

16300.
It's inedible
Meat by-product in a can
Yet I want seconds

--Mark Henderson, opusnbill95@hotmail.com


Move forwards to Numbers 16301-16400.
Return to the SPAM Haiku Archive page.
John Nagamichi Cho


SPAM is a registered trademark of Hormel Foods Corporation for luncheon meat. The Haiku Archive Master and the contributors to this website have no legal, commercial or financial involvement with Hormel Foods. Neither the information presented here, nor the manner in which it has been presented, has been sanctioned by Hormel Foods.