SPAM Haiku 19201-19300

Move backwards to Numbers 19101-19200.


19201.
Mom creates SPAM soup!
She did serve regular SPAM,
then...I made it soup!
--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19202.
SPAM sliced to the width
of one electron still would
taste as terrible.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19203.
Naked SPAM bathes in
my pan. The shameless vixen
wears no bikini!

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19204.
A hundred cans of
SPAM on the wall. A hundred
cans of SPAM still there.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19205.
It's been seven hours
and fifteen days since I ate
that SPAM. I'm still sick.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19206.
fried I like with eggs
yolk and grease run down my legs
pig now walks on pegs

--insaneequine@hotmail.com

19207.
My Horst does love SPAM
and liverwurst sandwiches.
I must divorce him.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19208.
spread the salty gel
on warm toast, oh what the hell
arteries rebel

--insaneequine@hotmail.com

19209.
SPAM is soooo not meat.
Does it even look like meat?
You know it doesn't.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19210.
This is our dinner!?
Oh babe, I beg to differ.
SPAM is not dinner!

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19211.
A broken mirror
and a can of SPAM both give
seven years bad luck.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19212.
Don't serve caviar.
SPAM more distinguished than ham
will suit them just fine.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19213.
My lunchbox holds a
secret SPAM and egg sandwich.
Please don't tell on me!

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19214.
Momma always said
put a knife under the can...
cuts the pain in two.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19215.
People will tell you
a diamond is forever,
but...so is my SPAM.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19216.
Hey, this ain't the "kind."
This here SPAM's a fugazi!
Break his legs Guido!!!

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19217.
The wise men came far
bringing frankincense and myrrh
and heavenly SPAM.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19218.
My boyfriend came home;
SPAM smeared in his pubic hair
I know he's cheatin'!!!

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19219.
Before he ate SPAM,
Ralph was just his given name.
Now Ralph KNOWS the verb.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19220.
I had SPAM for lunch
Grandma says I must wait ten
DAYS! before I swim!!!

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19221.
What is this toe jam
doing between my fingers?
Nevermind, its SPAM.

--Mithium (A.M.B.), pm_extreme9@yahoo.com

19222.
Only on the net
are nineteen thousand haiku
devoted to SPAM.

--tragicallywhiteguy

19223.
Old cutlet of SPAM
stabs at my tender stomach
like a rusty blade.

--tragicallywhiteguy

19224.
In the Pacific
fighting for peace with Japan
young soldiers ate SPAM.

--tragicallywhiteguy

19225.
Lost in dark forest
Poor hunting skills breed hunger
SPAM prevents my death

--tragicallywhiteguy

19226.
Old time folklore speaks
of gold at the rainbow's end.
I think SPAM awaits!

--tragicallywhiteguy

19227.
Deep Appalachia
Run-down diner in winter
Blue plate special? SPAM!

--tragicallywhiteguy

19228.
Literary sin?
Immortalized in haiku?
SPAM warrants either.

--tragicallywhiteguy

19229.
Infinite wisdom
To be attained in one life
SPAM shows us the light

--tragicallywhiteguy

19230.
A taste treat, you bet!
I stuff SPAM with Velveeta
Your guests will want more

--Mike eccles, Ecclesmike@aol.com

19231.
This is good advice
Spend your time earning money
Not writing SPAM-ku

--Angus Murray

19232.
BSE from SPAM?
Contaminated for years!
We're going to die!

--Angus Murray

19233.
The word Mar-ti-ni
Spelt backwards is "Ram it in"!
But "SPAM" is but "Maps"

--Angus Murray

19234.
Rub SPAM on your butt
Put your head between your legs
Kiss your ass goodbye!

--Angus Murray

19235.
They say fish is brain
food. Then the antithesis
to fish must be SPAM.

--Scott Smith, ssmith@us.edu

19236.
SPAM--all you can eat
for a buck! (a second can
has yet to be used).

--Scott Smith, ssmith@us.edu

19237.
Hormel has made a
product too challenging for
its fans to open.

--Scott Smith, ssmith@us.edu

19238.
The priest just arrived!
SPAM exorcism is deadly,
But God is with him.

--Shadowpig14

19239.
made a mannequin
from SPAM that was out of date
"can i marry you?"

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19240.
doughnuts made from SPAM...
culinary curio
or fragile sex-aid?

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19241.
angels cast to hell
coveting the SPAM of god
yet men mock SPAM. why?

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19242.
i like to buy SPAM
but eat the paper labels
wasteful but tasty

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19243.
see the rotten SPAM
it's a wondrous microcosm
for animalcules

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19244.
a hungry orphan
finds broken key on tin can
hunger but relief

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19245.
discounted coupons
"SPAM! two for the price of three!"
cruel typo error

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19246.
dead cockroach in SPAM
unappetizing problem:
eat roach but leave SPAM

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19247.
an old man found dead
starved but surrounded by SPAM
euthanasia?

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19248.
"don't play with your food"
"mom, what else to do with SPAM?"
perplexed i hold fork...

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19249.
SPAM morsel chokes me!
swallow it or suffocate?
which has more honor?

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19250.
abysmal pink cube
seasoned with tears of children
supper perdition

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19251.
my SPAM sandwiches:
made by maternal uncle
lunchbox carbuncle

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19252.
peel back the tin lid...
carrion? adipocere?
blue label white lies

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19253.
SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM
SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM
SPAM SPAM SPAM! THE END : )

--Anonymous

19254.
staring up at me
human eye found in SPAM loaf
like weird kinder egg

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19255.
ponder the sheep's face...
lambs make kebabs pigs make SPAM
sheep should look more smug

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19256.
hallucinations
SPAM spread on moldy rye bread
ergot innocent

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19257.
a SPAM-sculpted bride
a net-curtain wedding dress
married in basement

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19258.
Nobels and Oscars
Compare not to the greatness
Of the God named SPAM

--jake, marbles234@hotmail.com

19259.
I will kill myself
with the tab of that SPAM can.
What else can I do?

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19260.
Hubble telescope
Finds SPAM dominant life form
Hey, get used to it

--................................Swampnougat@netscape.net

19261.
As SPAM is to food
Like scrapple to an apple
Pink polymer dude

--Cubby--

19262.
SPAM and Pepto pink
Is this a coincidence
Absolutely not

--Cubby--

19263.
SPAM invades my mind.
Having never eaten it,
that's all it can do.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19264.
Lara hates the SPAM.
Panicked, I review my list,
But I still can't cook!

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19265.
Freeze SPAM into shards:
Use in martial arts defense.
Deadly sharp pink stars.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19266.
Oh, but yes my love!
SPAM, hot, squat, square, and naked.
My love's obsession.

--Little Anderson, Little_anderson@hotmail.com

19267.
quiet boy eats food
knows his family are poor
SPAM seasoned with love

--Anonymous

19268.
curiously light
the peeled key revealed nothing.
had SPAM ate itself?

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19269.
bought a punctured tin
unpleasant surprise to find
SPAM had gone quite green

--doopfan, doopfan@yahoo.com

19270.
Bathed in cold moonlight
Another empty SPAM can
Cruel, forelorn object

--Gene Schwimmer

19271.
Sexy, tight-fitting
Cloth, suitable for eating
I call it SPAM-dex

--Gene Schwimmer

19272.
Why did the chicken
Cross the road? After all, the
SPAM is on this side

--Gene Schwimmer

19273.
Roadkill, dead on road
Achieves immortality,
Sort of, in a can.

--Gene Schwimmer

19274.
In your fantasies
Conan the SPAMbarian
Slices and dices

--................................Swampnougat@netscape.net

19275.
SPAM may taste awesome,
But the stink has scared away
Many a girl. Darn!

--Shadowpig14

19276.
Shadowpig14
has been captured. They grind him
into ShadowSPAM.

--Shadowpig14

19277.
a beautiful mind
ran shrieking into SPAMness
neuron pathways gone

--................................Swampnougat@netscape.net

19278.
Now in Jamaica
Tourists are approached with SPAM
"Take a hit of this"

--................................Swampnougat@netscape.net

19279.
No progress in SPAM!
Just recapitulation
of Hormel's process.

--Milford Pigboy

19280.
Continuous, and
sublime, mass production; canned
pig to the masses!

--Milford Pigboy

19281.
The SPAMwich dissolves
In my mouth. I savor the
Taste. Then I blow chunks.

--Shadowpig14

19282.
Afternoon traffic
Some jerk-ass punk flips me off
I wish SPAM on him

--Dennis McDougall, dennism@pcez.com

19283.
I served SPAM, then died
I came back as a hem'rhoid
What goes 'round, comes 'round

--Dennis McDougall, dennism@pcez.com

19284.
Peed on a cow fence
It discharged into my schween
Still beats eating SPAM

--Dennis McDougall, dennism@pcez.com

19285.
Bullies ambushed me
Hot-glued my lips to my balls
Still beats eating SPAM

--Dennis McDougall, dennism@pcez.com

19286.
I slipped off the trail
Broken limbs gnawed at by wolves
Still beats eating SPAM

--Dennis McDougall, dennism@pcez.com

19287.
SPAM-ku artist says
"When do I get paid for these?"
"NEVER?!? Dammit, Cho!"

--Dennis McDougall, dennism@pcez.com

19288.
Natural color
of dead pig flesh is not pink!
SPAM: chemical ruse.

--Milford Pigboy

19289.
U.S. Taliban:
hatched and brought up from the depths
of a pig lagoon.

--Milford Pigboy

19290.
what is the time now
lunch time dinner time SPAM time
everywhere the same

--Sam Hill, llihmas@hotmail.com

19291.
White supremacists
stockpile SPAM but not because
it tastes any good.

--Milford Pigboy

19292.
Panting, sweating, yes!
Oh baby, deep-throat my SPAM
It's Hormel porno

--possumrex

19293.
SPAM SPAM it's healthy
pink, fatty, smelly, and new
nutritious food source

--hofflaw11@aol.com

19294.
what are you, cat food?
unidentifiable
SPAM in a can, SPAM

--hofflaw11@aol.com

19295.
fake politicians
SPAM wafting on a foul wind
suicide rampage

--e.w.herman

19296.
Add SPAM to some corn
Mix with Milky-Ways, simmer
Mmm. Delicious treat

--Nicki Jones, nicola.jones@student.adelaide.edu.au

19297.
full speed and pagan
frozen catotonia
a dribble of SPAM

--e.w.herman

19298.
these fates worse than death
contemplating the silence
of this empty plate

--karl smith, hipkarlmarx@charter.net

19299.
i follow the stream
into the waiting forest
thoughts of SPAM follow

--karl smith, hipkarlmarx@charter.net

19300.
solitary nests
silhouettes on winter's dawn
awaiting tenants

--barbara capee, barb@capece.ws


Move forwards to Numbers 19301-19400.
Return to the SPAM Haiku Archive page.
John Nagamichi Cho


SPAM is a registered trademark of Hormel Foods Corporation for luncheon meat. The Haiku Archive Master and the contributors to this website have no legal, commercial or financial involvement with Hormel Foods. Neither the information presented here, nor the manner in which it has been presented, has been sanctioned by Hormel Foods.