4501.
SPAM meets solid rock;
Who will be the winner here?
Only time will tell.
--David Goodrum, david.w.goodrum@aasc.com
4502.
Oh SPAM you're so good!!
Substitute for a woman,
Makes you think, don't it.
--David Goodrum, david.w.goodrum@aasc.com
4503.
The RepubliSPAMs
Gather in 2000 for
Convention in Minn.
--Martin H.Booda, booda@datasync.com
4504.
Bob Dole followed by
7-foot-tall condom filled
with eight feet of SPAM.
--Martin H.Booda, booda@datasync.com
4505.
I sit to eat SPAM.
I watch the Monty Python
The Vikings sing "SPAM!"
--Mystic Bagel
4506.
"SPAM" logo on hat...
Mocked by many, loved by some...
Secret laugh at all.
--Steven Sadoway, ssadoway@mit.edu
4507.
World champ pig caller
Makes appearance on Leno,
Soo-ey, snort, snort, SPAM.
--Dennis, martin@mp003.mv.unisys.com
4508.
Arecibo sees
Heaven while Cho examines
Hell: divine balance.
--zbaird@cjnetworks.com
4509.
Life is found on Mars!
Quick...eat up all the old SPAM!
They use it for fuel!
--Applecheeks
4510.
Eat barbequed SPAM
outdoors during the summer.
Hormel will love you!
--Applecheeks
4511.
Sunday hangover...
Party died down around 4:00
Only one cure: SPAM
--john p. nordbo
4512.
Blue can, pink contents:
snouts & ears & tails & feet.
I'm glad I'm not pork.
--john p. nordbo
4513.
Weird, oily pinkness...
Its texture makes my skin crawl.
Can we call it "food"?
--john p. nordbo
4514.
SPAM's Midwest birthplace
is Austin, Minnesota.
It is my mecca.
--john p. nordbo
4515.
Pity the vulture.
He sees a dead can of SPAM.
Carrion or not?
--john.foster@camel.com
4516.
Newton, Bach, Einstein
Calculus, Music, Physics
And now Hormel, SPAM
--Bill Ward, johnf@informix.com
4517.
October morning,
Clatter of tin on plastic--
Throwing out the can.
--Francis Heaney, francis.heaney@tglbbs.com
4518.
Nightfall in summer--
Reluctant to arrive, like
Me to my dinner.
--Francis Heaney, francis.heaney@tglbbs.com
4519.
Cheer up, little ant!
Although you might get stepped on,
No one will can you.
--Francis Heaney, francis.heaney@tglbbs.com
4520.
On my brown lunch bag,
A spreading translucent spot--
SPAM again today.
--Francis Heaney, francis.heaney@tglbbs.com
4521.
Call the garlic cloves,
The peppers, all your spices--
They won't help the SPAM.
--Francis Heaney, francis.heaney@tglbbs.com
4522.
My new parakeet
Learned to say "Polly wants SPAM,"
But won't say it--wise.
--Francis Heaney, francis.heaney@tglbbs.com
4523.
hatchery product
just "homeless seagoing spam"
whither wild salmon
--Colleen Kirby, ckirby@naic.edu
4524.
once proud stream stalwarts
king, silver, red, humpbacked, dog
now hatched homeless spam
--Colleen Kirby, ckirby@naic.edu
4525.
entire streams fished out
coho, sockeye, pink, chum, 'nook
processed fish product
--Colleen Kirby, ckirby@naic.edu
4526.
Deep in the landfill,
An airtight pocket of trash
Keeps the SPAM intact.
--Francis Heaney, francis.heaney@tglbbs.com
4527.
As the clown dances,
The children laugh. When he eats
SPAM, though, they all cry.
--Francis Heaney, francis.heaney@tglbbs.com
4528.
A strange sound--faint rip
And a heavy splat. The SPAM
Fell off the ceiling.
--Francis Heaney, francis.heaney@tglbbs.com
4529.
Next on "The X-Files":
Mulder learns of a dark plot
To sell SPALIEN.
--Francis Heaney, francis.heaney@tglbbs.com
4530.
A pleasant dinner
Of SPAM is marred only by
Everyone's vomit.
--Francis Heaney, francis.heaney@tglbbs.com
4531.
Where's that metal key?
So pink and gelatinous,
The SPAM calls to me.
--Anonymous
4532.
SPAM repulses me
It's black market zebra meat
It makes me vomit
--Anonymous
4533.
Her eyes!! So blue, like
A SPAM can. Your stomach hurts.
Love? Indigestion?
--Guy Chaney, GUYSAGE@aol.com
4534.
Spamku art form is
Truly neat. But you ain't lived
'Til you've tried the meat!!
--Guy Chaney, GUYSAGE@aol.com
4535.
White bread, mayonnaise,
Cut SPAM, hot onion, cold beer.
Ah! Be still, my heart!!
--Guy Chaney, GUYSAGE@aol.com
4536.
J'ai bien trop grossi
Je'n mangerai plus le SPAM
Je mange le SPAM Lite
--john.thornton@state.or.us
4537.
In a nice blue box
Contains my spreadable lunch
How I long to eat
--Bonnie Burton, bonnie@grrl.com
4538.
I don't eat the stuff:
Nasty, fatty, disgusting--
I prefer cat food.
--Joani
4539.
square rounded corners
a shape not found in nature
SPAM, how I love thee
--Tim Rowell, tim@mass-illusion.com
4540.
Gorilla saves child:
Kid's about to eat SPAM, and
ape yanks it away.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
4541.
Remember grade school?
Grilled SPAM sandwiches for lunch?
Boy, those were the days!
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
4542.
1968
Democratic convention:
"SPAM you, you SPAMmer!"
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
4543.
SPAM in the toilet.
Should I flush, or fish it out?
It's hard to decide.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
4544.
Well, on second thought,
the decision's not so tough.
Get me the plunger.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
4545.
Stick two nails in SPAM.
Hook them to a light socket.
It cooks really fast!
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
4546.
"Police officers!
Drop the SPAM and come out of
there with your hands up!"
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
4547.
Waiting period
for those wanting to buy SPAM?
Not a bad idea.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
4548.
Serial killers
sometimes feed their victims SPAM.
Talk about sadists!
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
4549.
SPAM ain't so bad! It's
got vitamins, and it's got...
Aw, the hell with it.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
4550.
Mother fed us SPAM
Everyday, ate: our bodies
Were preserved mummies
--jean wang, jean@eohsi.rutgers.edu
4551.
SPAM the hero brave
Through the forest he goes fast
To our dinner plates
--Raanan Elefant
4552.
Nasty pink food slab
Supposedly once a pig
Now just disgusting
--Gregor Everitt, gregor@mhtc.net
4553.
The can of SPAM LITE
has eaten my pet schnauzer.
Cherry possums fall.
--Anonymous
4554.
A quiche laced with SPAM
fed to unsuspecting young
French students. Ha ha!
--Anonymous
4555.
The forest at dawn:
Dappled sun lights pine needles
And empty SPAM tins.
--Peter B., Raleigh, NC
4556.
I want my canned SPAM
With caviar and truffles.
Oxymoron, yes!
--Anonymous
4557.
Heisenberg liked SPAM.
Certain about nothing, though
Surprise was his lot!
--Anonymous
4558.
Perfection uncanned
Like a beautiful redhead
Fresh from her trailer
--John Mitchell, jam@altagroup.com
4559.
A generous boy
Offers Jesus his sandwich
Five thousand taste SPAM
--John Mitchell, jam@altagroup.com
4560.
Square as our shoulders
Red as our Bible Belt necks
Soft as our bellies
--John Mitchell, jam@altagroup.com
4561.
SPAM by candle light
What could be more romantic?
Open the Night Train.
--John Mitchell, jam@altagroup.com
4562.
Poised in wire jaws,
The pink assassin awaits
The nibbling rodent.
--John Mitchell, jam@altagroup.com
4563.
TV commercial
Says, "This is your brain on SPAM.
Any questions?" No.
--John Mitchell, jam@altagroup.com
4564.
Clever Daedalus
Makes wings of SPAM and feathers.
At last, pigs can fly!
--John Mitchell, jam@altagroup.com
4565.
From the labyrinth,
Two men rise on pork pinions.
(Beware the hot sun!)
--John Mitchell, jam@altagroup.com
4566.
Careless Icarus
Falls midst feathers and warm fat.
An ignoble death.
--John Mitchell, jam@altagroup.com
4567.
I recall his plight
Whenever I gaze upwards
And the clouds blaze pink.
--John Mitchell, jam@altagroup.com
4568.
Effete paté freaks,
The Spamish Inquisition
Will make you think pink!
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4569.
SPAM nasty pink meat
See it in my dreams hear bells
Wake up feeling heat
--Anonymous
4570.
HOGMA TO LIVE BY:
"Let us now praise heinous SPAM."
(Rudyard Chittering.)
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4571.
Hormel's cookbook: One
SPAM thing after another.
Weep, you chefs of France!
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4572.
It's SPAM tomorrow
And SPAM yesterday but (it's)
Never SPAM today.
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4573.
A can of SPAM lurks
On your kitchen cupboard shelf;
Just waiting to pounce.
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4574.
The purchase of SPAM
Is very much like buying
A pig in a poke.
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4575.
The Surgeon-Gen'ral
Wants this warning on SPAM cans:
"Beware of the Hog!"
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4576.
Wonder: Is it meat?
Wonder: Is it even food?
God only knows...SPAM.
--Anonymous
4577.
Pink furry things live
In my fridge. Are they Gremlins
Or last month's Spamlets?
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4578.
Creamy with mayo,
Their naked bodies slithered
On a bed of SPAM.
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4579.
The accordion
Ought to be banned, except when
Played by Art van Spamme.
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4580.
Come on and hear! It's
Alexander's Ragtime Spam
Playing low-down pinks.
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4581.
Many porcine gods
Were worshipped by the Romans
In the Spamtheon.
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4582.
Up there in the sky!
Faster than a speeding snail!
Look! It's Superspam!
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4583.
SPAM and sauerkraut
Sausage is, without a doubt,
The absolute wurst!
--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net
4584.
See Monty Python
My TV echoes a chant
SPAM SPAM egg and SPAM
--Robert Grober
4585.
God spoke to his "peops"
Let us get shit underway
(And let there be SPAM)
--Anonymous
4586.
And then Moses said
The Eleventh Commandment--
"Thou shalt consume SPAM"
--Anonymous
4587.
fresh out of the can
i like to share it with friends
spam on vacation
--Anonymous
4588.
Let's get to it then
he said as his digits hit
the empty blue can.
--JJJ, nigle@netnitco.net
4589.
My homepage to swine
was inspired by SPAM WHAT AM.
God, what have I done?
--JJJ, nigle@netnitco.net
4590.
Haiku, seventeen
was inspired by pink SPAM smell.
Four thousand and more.
--JJJ, nigle@netnitco.net
4591.
I live for today
I love sex and drive too fast.
SPAM's on my menu.
--JJJ, nigle@netnitco.net
4592.
Hope, Love, Charity,
Remembrance and Impatience,
Virtue, Sue, and SPAM.
--JJJ, nigle@netnitco.net
4593.
He called me a fool
The empty can on the floor
Pink crud in my teeth
--JJJ, nigle@netnitco.net
4594.
Marigolds are blue
and roses stink to heaven.
Your SPAM loaf is GREAT!
--JJJ, nigle@netnitco.net
4595.
Crisco and K-Y,
axle grease, mud, and Jell-O:
Real men use SPAMLUBE.
--JJJ, nigle@netnitco.net
4596.
I'm lying in bed
dreaming of tomorrow's meal:
Poached SPAM with pearl sauce.
--JJJ, nigle@netnitco.net
4597.
Todd Rundgren once sang
"Onomatopoeia" whew,
Clink, clank, clunk no SPAM.
--JJJ, nigle@netnitco.net
4598.
Hormel and Alpo
Announce collaboration:
"With SPAM by-products."
--Len Pal, LenPal@tiac.net
4599.
My mother hates SPAM.
I find it a lot like life.
Greasy, but still good.
--Jacob, Seagate@Wilmington.com
4600.
I've gone months without
reading and writing Spamku.
Proved that I could quit
--Dale Wisely, dwisely@wwisp.com