Date: Tue, 9 Dec 1997 23:50:38 EST From: "your reality check is in the mail..." Subject: INT: Emjay: Sensuous? Who, me? (was: Re: F: Just give me the award now...) (just playing with my fingers, keeping the brainstem warm...) [err...warning, humor attempted! beware the punny turn of phrase, the id unwatched by superego...he snickered when he finished this. yes, he chortled, chuckled, and was generally amused...you have been warned.] On Sun, 7 Dec 1997 12:14:08 -0800, Chris Vaughan flung up the banners and trumpeted :) :) SEXISM! :) :) Why can't *I* be most sensuous? Why can't *I* be list flirt? Because :) I'm a man, right!?!?!?! :) :) Bah! Sensuous? The OAD says "adj. affecting or appealing to the senses, especially by beauty or delicacy. sensuously adv. sensuousness n. This word does not have the implication of undesirable behavior that _sensual_ can have. Sensual, then? "adj. 1. physical, gratifying to the body, _sensual pleasures_. 2. indulging oneself with physical pleasures, showing that one does this, _a sensual face_..." So that which is sensuous affects or appeals to us? while individual titilation of various sorts, all narcissism indulged to the narcotic dismay of others (no premise of tit-for-tat or even titivation) is merely sensual (albeit consensual, may one query if its conscienciable? or is that a question of conscientiousness?) Well, then, onwards and upwards, Chris, for in the appeal to the aesthetic pleasures of the senses, tantalizing and captivating with graceful beauty and delicate engagements, the grosser indulgences of the gender biased, while indubitably noisier and damper, are not the finest arbiters of the sublime stimuli being sought. Hitch up your kilt, and let's consider the best way to proceed. Allow me, then, to recommend to your attention the subtle beginning. Perhaps silk, a handkerchief trailed artfully across the arm or hand, barely touching, almost a shiver on the fine hairs of the neck... Or the merest trace of incense? No, too powerful... Perhaps a beeswax candle, lit for mere moments, just allowed to warm, then blown out and the wick snuffed and trimmed to avoid the bitter smoke. That gentle perfume wafting through the background... Music? perhaps, perhaps... but gentle, soft, a background unheard, cuddling the two of you in well-known melodies... Inagaddadavida? Well, no, not right away... And conversation, of the finest sort. Listen, listen well, and speak from your heart of those things that touch you. Do not rush, but breath slowly and softly, with your eyes watching that face, your body relaxed, trusting... Give of your time...of yourself. And I'm sure that if you are sensuous, truly affecting and appealing to the senses of the other, focusing yourself on making that person happy, whole, and joyful... That beginning will blossom and flourish, into the fullest flowering of entwined sensuousness for both of you, and yield more sensual fruit than even Croesus could command or crave... The immoral of the tale? From subtle beginnings, great climaxes grow. tink