Date: Tue, 16 Dec 1997 06:20:29 -0600 From: Thomas Michaels Subject: FILLER: EmJay Awards...Impending Death...Life in General... Well, here we go---the annual EmJay Awards are nearly over, and we have the same group of people pulling out all the stops to get a vote or two. Frankly, this sort of behaviour has always disgusted me, and I can take pride in knowing that I would never resort to doing anything so obviously stupid. Yes, as I lay here on my deathbed, I have promised myself that I'm not going to burden you good people with my problems. I'll be just fine, even if I don't win any of the awards. Sure, the pain is beyond description, but don't you worry about me. I'm going to be just fine. I can promise you that. Now, some of you are probably wondering just what it is that is killing me. Well, I made the fatal mistake of listening to Andrew Lloyd Webber's SUNSET BOULEVARD 18 times in a row, and apparently, I've overdosed on melodramatic musicals. The doctors had warned me about this before, back when I had my near-death experience with LES MISERABLES. But, foolish me, I had to go ahead and prove them wrong. Guess I showed them. Well, I suppose I'd best sign off now. The lights are going down, the room is spinning, and I think that I'm being paged to go to that big musical stage in the sky. Curiously, though, the doctors did suggest that if I were to win some sort of EmJay, the effects might be just powerful enough to fend off my impending demise. Huh. Go figure. Goodbye, my friends... ***Jester*** "I used to believe in God---until Bill Gates bought Him out." ---Thomas Michaels