Date: Thu, 14 Nov 1996 19:46:22 -0600 From: Daffid Subject: Re: INT: SPT: CathyB dresses for the kill At 09:07 AM 11/14/96 -0500, Catherine Berchtold wrote: > > - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - > >The ladies headed off to full fill their promise written in the Man Haters >Mission Statement. > >CathyB waded up the bag and dusted off her finger tips. "Isn't it nice >to rest and do some 'girl talk'? Are you ready to continue?" > >Omar nodded his head and sent his wig to wobbling. He heaved his >body off the ground with the back end going up first. CathyB saw a >bit of leg and noticed the black line in his hose was twisted. > >She smiled sweetly and pointed out, "Omar, your line is twisted." > >The tent maker blushed and fixed his hose. When all was ready, CathyB >stabbed her gun into the small of his back and they were on their way. Out on the parking lot the neon Sweating Pig Tavern sign sputtered and flashed in benign neglect. Arriving patrons stopped short upon seeing this petite stern faced woman, shotgun in hand, marching a largish ornately clad Kate Smith wannabe across the tarmac. They reached Omar's bright pink Suburban (the exclusive Tammy Faye Bakker designer model with giant backlit fibreoptic eyelashes on the headlights, beaver pelt bumpers and paint that runs when it gets wet). Omar opened the rear doors of the Suburban and slid out the overhead racks of dresses. He reached in, selected one, turned around (breaking a heel) and held it out for her approval. "Goshawmighty. You want me to wear THAT?" she gasps, holding up a semi-translucent mesh tangle of black cording and small black triangles. "Best campaign outfit Victoria's Secret has to offer." "I don't know what you think I'm campaigning for...", jabbing the shotgun in Omar's ribs,"....but I'm a married woman and that just will NOT do. Now where's that Annie Oakley outfit you talked about?" Quickly shuffling through the rack of dresses, he pulls out another. "Now Cathy, you will look absolutely smashing in this. Better than Annie Oakley ever dreamed about." "Hmmmmmmm. Well, this looks like the real thing. Let me go try it on." Leaning her shotgun against the fender, she traipses off to the tent, enters and tightly closes the flaps. "Omar, you try any peeking while I'm in here changing and you are going to lose an eye and some other irreplaceable parts." Omar, adjusting his wig and hitching up his garter belt, ponders the probabilities of tent-related reprisal and inventories body parts available for sacrifice. > > Daffid ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "If any cleric or monk speaks jocular words, such as provoke laughter, let him be anathema." Ordinance, Second Council of Constance (1418)