>>> Item number 21860 from WRITERS LOG9312A --- (192 records) ---- <<< Date: Sat, 4 Dec 1993 18:35:01 JST Reply-To: WRITERS Sender: WRITERS From: Mike Barker Subject: FAQ: 'Twas the Night Before... (Silent Night? NOT!) It's beginning to look a lot like ... Hi! Oh, you're here for the holiday play? Sit down, it's starting right now. The old saloon is packed, and here come the words... 'Twas the Night Before... (Silent Night? NOT!) Copyright 1993 Mike Barker It was quiet on the net, not a piece of mail in sight, so you prowled through the lists, and you hung your name out there in a North Dakota lodge. Then you closed your eyes and waited. And it happened. Creeping down the keyboard to your PC (Mac, Sun, or other terminal), peeking through the mailings, you couldn't believe your eyes! What a pile of mail had gathered in the twinkling of an eye! If you squeeze your eyes shut, and blink away the dust, you may think you see a most absurd character at work there, stumbling over his fingers as he sets a pile under the tinsel, whistling half-cracked tunes as he slips messages into your socks and shorts, and laughing quite inanely as he ponders over the words. Then he turns and looks right at you, and you surely have to say, "Just who are you and why are you handing out mail without pants?" He grins and chuckles, rubs his belly and wrinkles his face, and then in complete disgrace, he says, "Why, tis plain as the nose on my face, which I very rarely see, that I'm Insane Clause, here with mail for every ghoul and ghoy, just to make writing your joy!" Then he slaps you on the back, and introduces his elves, brings the reindeer inside for a snack, and sets your mind a whirl. Then you blink again, press a key or two, and he's gone - but he'll be back! It certainly wasn't what you might have thought you'd find, but it may be just the thing to keep your brain alive, this list with its Insane Clause, and elves, and trees, and piles of exercises stretching, subs gaily diving, crits scratching itches, fillers gurgling merriment, and all the other fine surprise packages tumbling down the chimney to your electronic home. Don't shut the door, don't go back to bed, just read and enjoy, and... When you are ready, with or without pants, feeling or romance, give old Clause a rest and tell us of your plants. Sing us of your prose, punctuate us with rhyme, give us of your time. For the fact of the matter is that Insane Clause is in his workshop, fiddling with the plots and pants, trying to cover up the invisible with strings of words and cloth of holes, and he'd dearly appreciate some company. Join in? tink - scribe to Insanity! Jingle bells, jingle bells... oh what words we mock and pun a writing here tonight! writing through the snore, with a pun or two to ignore, over the net we go, writing all the way! Hey! Grab hold, 'cause its time for hot words roasting in an open plot, and other seasonal variations on a tale! Enjoy yourself, and don't sit under the misty toes of the muse with anybody else but us, anybody else but us... "Bah. Humbug." Not bad, but would you like to elaborate your story a bit, Mr. Scrooge? Go ahead - we're waiting to read you!