Date: Sat, 15 Feb 1997 10:25:35 -0500 From: Catherine Berchtold Subject: Re: INT: Hillbilly Haven At 07:27 AM 2/15/97 -0500, Tommy Carter wrote: > Bertha Mae Pidgin wuz th Purtiest gal in Hillbilly Haven. She walked down >the main street of Hillbilly Haven shuffling her barefeet through the dust >scurrying the chickens in her path. She wuz well aware of the boys watching >from the sidewalk. She knew the enticin effect her six foot two hundred pound >figure had on the local boys. No other girl had such a nice set of childbarin >hips as she did. > Hound Murdoch hitched up his over-alls, and headed in the street to ask >Bertha Mae to the fall corn festival. He had visions of swanging her >beautiful body at the square dance. With any luck maybe he could steal a kiss >ater the dance. As he entered the street the huge figure of Mountain Goat >Simms walked out from the other side. His eyes locked on Bertha Mae. She knew >thar wuz about ta be trouble. Daisy Mae stood outside the dry goods store, clutchin her bag of beans to her small breast and eye-balled Bertha Mae with envy. None of the local boys paid her the time of day, cuz they wuz all cow-eyed over Bertha Mae and her childbarin hips. She done seen Hound Murdoch make a fool of hisself in public on account of big breasted women and it looked like he wuz gonna do it agin. Ol' Mountain Goat Simms, hisself, had a hankerin for the enticin, childbarin hips of Bertha Mae and ev'rybody in town done know'd it. Daisy Mae squeezed her beans tighter and watched the two ol' boys makin their way in the street, kickin up dust as they both headed fur them childbarin hips. Hillbilly Haven's stray dawg, BubbaWoof, the blue tick coon bitch, made a abrupt stop inna street, hunched her back and let fly a big ball o' pasta. Daisy Mae, naturally internsted in lernin, took a few steps closer to see what the dawg let loose of. From past experence, she believed that big ol' ball of wigglin pasta was tapeworms. Before Daisy Mae know'd what was happenin, poor ol' Hound Murdoch stepped inna that wigglin pasta what the dawg left and slid his way inna makin a fool of hisself agin.