Date:         Mon, 2 Mar 1998 07:57:24 +0800
From: Raymond McDowell <bbgpted@ASIAONLINE.NET>
Subject:      INT: The Resort

B.B. Loi was outraged.

"What do you mean, reservations? We were told this site was unreserved."

"No, Miss. I don't mean them kind of reservations," replied the hunkish
security guard, flexing his biceps. "I mean youse got to swear you don't
have no woild animals, outer-space aliens nor  bird's nest soup on your
person or general vicinity."

"I will do no such thing. I am not that kind of girl."

"That's why you gotta swear, to verify you ain't carryin' any troublesome
contraband on youse."

"That's what I mean. I never swear. I'm a good girl."

"Aw, *.!$%," said Xiao. "I'll *@!@$)-in' swear for you. We ain't got no
(5&#!*in' contaban. There, is that ($#@*(&^in' good enough for you? or do
you want it in writing?"

The security guard blushed.

"Excuse me," he said. "Oi don't unnerstand all them technical terms. Oi'll
have to git Ms.Wolfesse t' come and take your deposition if y'r gonna make
y'r statement in pooterese."

(to be continued)


(For anyone wishing to capture the full impact of this meandering saga, Tink
has graciously allotted it some space at the WRITERS segement of his Web
presentation.  Just tune your Web browser to the following URL:
http://web.mit.edu/mbarker/www/road/road.html)

Cast:
Ms. B.B. Loi: Former Hong Kong pop star, now a secret agent for the HKSAR.
Also wife of Rqy.
Momma Wong: B.B. Loi's mother.
Rqy:  Now disguised as a buddhist monk, he is a ne'er do well and a
vagabond. In short, a writer. Husband of B.B. Loi.
Xiao Da Shing Shing:  Cyber-monkey turned hominid.
Bruce Magrill: Resort Security