Date: Mon, 30 Jun 1997 15:55:56 -0500 From: Phanny Subject: INT: PAPP: Where the heck is everyone? Dwayne polishes the long wood bar with a piece of oiled pigskin, seeming to be daydreaming. "Dwayne!! Would you pay attenshun?!!!" Phanny implores impatiently. "I could afford to do that, Phanny honey, if I still had all those pigs..." "Aww Dwayne, .... yer gittin smarter every day in them college classes. Now help me with this list. Do you think we *really* have to invite those AGHAST gents again this year?" "Way I hear it, they invited themselves, if you mean the Association of Greater Highborn Australian Swells and Tipplers." "They did. How in tarnation does Herri always know everything? P. Herrington Hamwort III.... Grand Mitred Emu of AGHAST..... that rascal!" Phanny says in mockery. "So do I invite Lady Bruinhilda or Muffy Fineburg? Or both?" "Heh! Make it interesting; invite both! Shame Chuck and Bubbles aren't together anymore. She was good phun...." Suddenly a skidding noise. A cloud of dust blows into the open door of the Sweating Pig Tavern. "Woofie! Aww... and the puppies.... Hiya Muttpup!" "Hi Aunt Phanny! My momma bin dragging uth all over the plathe! We wath in California and Oregon! I got to thwim in the thea!!" Phanny smiles. Xiao jumps down from the ceiling lights, in his coolie hat, and hugs Muttpup. "Hey Xiao, where is Rqy? He's just the person I need..... say.... would like to take some phast transporter rides, you and Muttpup? I could use some help here. You think you can round up Oglum P. Boomp, Siggy, Omar, Buttdawg, that dude in the plaid kilt..... erm.... do we want him or not? Yes? OK...... and Howie. I know I'm missing some.... but that should keep you busy today." "Me, me, me!! I wanna go with Xiao!!! Kin I git that Bugth Bunny pheller, too, Aunt Phanny??" "Sure, sweetie. I phorgot about him.... " "Cripes," growls Wolfess, scritchin her bum thoughtfully. "I ain't seen Buttie lately.... I hope he ain't gorn off with one of them Irish Setters again! Bleedin pus bucket!! Muttpup, you tell yer pappy to git his tail over here or I'll rip his mangey hind legs orf!!" Xiao, the monkey, and Muttpup trot off cheerfully. "Oh no," says Phanny, "who brought those monkeys to the New Years party? Was it that pheller in the plaid kilt or that Fadar pheller? Geeze Louise, we shore don't want to invite him!"