Has This Ever Happened to You?

Help! My advisor treats me like dirt! He never tells me what he expects me to do, but then constantly criticizes me for not doing what he wants! When I do what I think he wants, he says I need to be more original, but when I try to take any initiative he berates my ideas and insists that I need to respect authority! Now my experiment is suffering because I can't communicate productively with anyone about it!

Help! My labmate is psycho! He makes friendly chatter with everyone else in the lab, but goes out of his way to sneer at me whenever we meet! When I try to ask him gently what he's angry about, he clams up like a sullen seventh-grader and refuses to have a normal conversation with me! I thought we were all adults here?!

Help! My advisor assigned me to work with a senior student who's been doing this stuff for so long that he forgot what it's like to be a beginner! When I ask simple questions about how things work, he makes a face like I just asked the stupidest question in the world and gives a dismissive, incomprehensible response, and when I try to ask what he means he accuses me of challenging his authority! When I try to talk to my advisor about it, he blames me and says I need to learn to work with people! Help!

The MIT Physics REFS are Course 8 graduate students here to listen to your problems. While MIT provides institute-wide services such as Nightline and MIT Mental Health for administering to general counseling needs, many of the concerns that arise in Course 8 students' lives are specific to the particular environment of the Physics department -- and, as such, can only be appreciated by other Course 8 students. The REFS are here to be those students.

All members of the MIT Physics REFS have undergone extensive Institute-certified training in conflict mediation. We are available to serve as neutral mediators in private, closed-door student-student or student-faculty conflict-resolution sessions. But we are also here to participate in confidential, one-on-one discussions of the difficulties you are facing. We will listen to your description of the situation and provide a sounding board for your possible resolutions. We can also connect you with other sources of assistance, or help to get you started in taking action to resolve a situation. But we will never take any action on your behalf or disclose any portion of our confidential discussion, to anyone, without your express prior consent.

To schedule a private, confidential meeting with a member of the MIT Physics REFS, email physrefs@mit.edu, stop by one of our offices, or call one of us at the numbers below.