Behave (solution)

by Jordan Bennett Louis Smith

ALMOST		Nearly (6)
ANNIE PROULX	Brokeback scribe (5, 6)
ANNOTATION	Marginal comment in a copy of Hamlet, maybe (10)
ARTIFICIAL	Like some intelligence (10)
BALKED		Gave up a base without pitching, maybe (6)
BAR SPOON	Elongated drink-stirring utensil (3, 5)
BIOPSY		It's taken before an important test (6)
CHIMP		Caesar or Bonzo, for example (5)
COMMUTATIVE	Unlike the cross product (11)
ENGINE ROOM	Montgomery Scott's workplace (6, 4)
FILMS		The answers to the next two clues, for example (5)
GHOST		Word before story or writer (5)
HIGH NOON	Time for a Western showdown (4, 4)
HUGO WEAVING	Smith and V portrayer (4, 7)
INDIVIDUAL	Part of IRA (10)
KLUTZY		Like a maladroit fellow (6)
MOUNTAIN DEW	Pepsi relative (8, 3)
MOZAMBIQUE	Y-shaped African country (10)
OMNIVOROUS	Like pigs, crows, and bears (10)
ON LOCATION	Where Woody Allen usually shoots (2, 8)
ONYX		Leo's birthstone (4)
POSTED		Displayed, like a cast list (6)
SEQUOIA		Huge tree or vehicle (7)
TUX		Informal word for formal wear (3)

The answers are supposed to be sorted into 4 categories. The four categories are for words/phrases that have:

All five vowels
ANNIE PROULX, COMMUTATIVE, HUGO WEAVING, MOUNTAIN DEW, MOZAMBIQUE, SEQUOIA
Same vowel/consonant pattern (VCCVCVCVVC)
ANNOTATION, ARTIFICIAL, ENGINE ROOM, INDIVIDUAL, OMNIVOROUS, ON LOCATION
Letters in alphabetical order
ALMOST, BIOPSY, CHIMP, FILMS, GHOST, TUX
Every pair of letters is a bigram in the alphabet
BALKED, BAR SPOON, HIGH NOON, KLUTZY, ONYX, POSTED

There is a single 10-letter string that obeys all 4 properties: ABDEHINOUV. Using this as the keyword of a Playfair square, we obtain:

ABDEH
INOUV
CFGKL
MPQRS
TWXYZ

The cipher text now can be decoded:

GI MP VQ DY RO VT
CO SM OS EX QU IZ

Giving the answer, COSMO SEX QUIZ.

William S. Bergman
William S. Bergman