Investigator’s Report

William S. Bergman is the hippest reviewer out there. If a show is experimental and incomprehensible, he’s sure to like it so much he’ll go see it twice, just so he can save both halves of the ticket. But if he doesn’t feel it’s an important work, he’ll only see it once. (We couldn’t say how he feels about shows he doesn’t see.)

Here is Bergman’s collection of ticket stubs.

Row O Seat 9 Clay Cup Row K Seat 3 Mud Cracks

Row R Seat 6 Groom Me

Row S Seat 2 Gumbo Row Q Seat 7 Up Quick, Row B Seat 4 V-Chips

Row T Seat 5 Hug Joe Row R Seat 7 It’s Lit Row Y Seat 8 Byron, No

Row K Seat 3 I’m So Row H Seat 2 Why Fall

Row K Seat 1 King Quit Row L Seat 1 Ah, Now Row I Seat 6 He Fears

Row T Seat 5 What Fez

Row H Seat 8 YMCA Row I Seat 4 Gawky Jim

as Gaps Mark a Major Quaggy Hazard Row V Seat 5

by a Gangplank, Jan Brady? Row V Seat 1

Klutz, It’s Just Twilight Row Y Seat 3

Making a Banana-Fig Pizza Row Q Seat 6

May Become Tax-Exempt? Row J Seat 7

Mummifying Civic Junk Row W Seat 8

Now for Exxon/GQ Offer, John Row Z Seat 2

Wimpy O.J. in My Fizzy Gin Drink Row Q Seat 4

William S. Bergman
William S. Bergman