In ``Saint Valentine's'' VooDoo
- Te Story of the Little Red Hen ---
A fable by G.L. Dryfoos, the illegitimate child of Ayn Rand and
- The Snap Dragon Chronicles ---
Rapidograph madness from Henry Chiu.
- Crimewatch ---
MIT Campus Police Log from Hani Sallum.
- Myriad ---
More (or less) flotsam from the twisted minds of Cherry Ogata.
- Malnutrition ---
Raluca Barbulescu's vision of the world. Truly a sight to behold.
- Guide to the Essentials of Organic Chem-Mystery ---
Yep, that's what it is. By Wan-Ying Chee.
- I Laughed, I Cried, I Projectile Vomited ---
A second opinion of the 1993 Ig Nobel Prizes.
- One Night, Part V ---
Coffee... Goddamn. WILL SOMEONE GET ME SOME COFFEE?
- Gilbert and his Doll ---
Max Lord proves he is more alternative than you.
- Slug-Bunny ---
A stunning period piece by Jennie López.
- Eight Bits for a Night of Pain ---
Jason shows that violence is the only solution.
- Random Memoranda ---
A day in the life of John Dzenitis.
- Beyond Maximum Horror, Part II ---
Marauding infants and more from Pete Finkelstein.
- How Many Stupid Ways Are There to Kill Yourself? ---
Well, what are you waiting for? By the nihilistic Kai Chiang.
- Letters to the Editor ---
Our readers live to regret writing to us.
- Bathroom Evaluation Guide ---
Please return it.
- Raging Dave ---
If you know who Dave really is, please call the office.