Dear Sirs,

"Oh, no! I think they're going to start in on our darkroom again," said Hoyt, bleakly.


Tom Swifty,
Phys. Plant

Hey Phos -

Q: What's the difference between John and Lorena Bobbitt?
A: She's crazy and he's JUST NUTS!

Q: What do you call a midget fortune-teller who recently escaped from prison?
A: A small medium at-large.


Ha ha ha... SMACK!

Dear Phos,

With all the doctoral qualifying examinations coming up again this January, I would like to offer a helping hand to all of the pitiful, stressed-out souls who will be forced to endure all of the degradation and humiliation that the Institute generated for myself one year ago. Before and during exams, I saw them as nothing more than cruel torturings imposed on helpless peons by the forces of evil and darkness for only the purpose of their amusement. Having passed these examinations, I realize now how gifted I am and how necessary they are to insure the timeless grandeur and prestige of our hallowed graduate school. My conscience weighs heavy, however, and for this reason alone I would like to offer my shoulder to all those who must tread the path on which I wept.

Kevin L. Wasson
Enfield, NH

Kevin, if you think the qualifiers were humiliating, just wait!