Adin: Now you just gotta find Will Detmold and spank his tiny English ass.

Linda: Ah yes. With the monguls. How could I forget.

Federico: Alcohol? Not in my Christian mouth!
Spocky: No, just a bunch of dicks.

Kevin: I saw a small light in Bemis, and I thought it was a faint glimmer of hope, then I realized it was just your cigarette.

Annie: Its ok I hate guns with love.

Linda: I found out on my trip that Rhode Island is not an island.

Kevin: You know what they say--- *chokes on chicken* *aggressive coughing ensues*

Hector: *Walks into Adrian's room, looks around* It seems early in the morning, but it's only two... *walks away*
Laurel: ... Deep Thoughts with Hector

Spocky: I dont like her or her robot.

Federico: lets gangbang Adrian.
Adrian: I am but a fragile boy

Tesla (EC Pres): 4th East. Least Favorite Child.

Annie: I'm like Jesus. I love people who don’t deserve it

Annie: Sloan school boys look like the reason there's still feminism in America.

Jonathan: Do they give MIT legacy status to people who drop out?

Sophie: Are you supposed to threaten Jesus?

Adrian: *disressed* You're gonna squeeze the milk out of me!

Hector: My friend Karina is willing to help me with my crotch problem

Hector: *points to computer* does this thing have youtube?

Henry: It’s not incest if you don’t see them

Emile: *Talking about 2.009* That's not an invention; fish already exist!

Danny: Never have I ever had an opinion

Danny: Wow, who am I going to yell at next year without you?

*Sounds of multiple people running*
Federico: I'M GOING TO POOP IN YOUR ROOM!!
Kaarel: No don't pooooop!
*Sounds of screaming for several minutes*

James: Juniper berries are WHACK

Fed: Adin the party, 5 votes
*in the distance*
Adin: Oh boy, I beat Climate Change?

Fed: Name a more iconic duo
Fernie: Hector and Alcohol

Antares: Just don't! Just don't not fuck! Stop Stopping!

Antares: 3-2-1 stop thinking about Dick Cheney, o.k.

Emile: The doctor said he couldn't fix me, he said I got real-nigga-itis

Tesla: The best part of living coutyard side is being able to get off to the Green Building

Antares: Is Bernie Sanders your type Dan?
Danny: Ya, he's rich and about to die. That's totally my type

Dan: If I ever need to see the manager at KFC, I'm definitely asking to see the Colonel
Antares: They're legally obliged to poison your food if you do that

Antares: Humans of the East Side is one word away from being T.H.O.T.E.S, we just have to call it THE Humans of the East Side.
This could be the next big thing.

Grace: I believe that nipples are an accessory

Ally: What if we talked by breathing in instead of breathing out? *proceeds to make gasping noises*

Dan: MOONSHOES!?!?!?!?!?!? YOU MEAN THE KID POWERED ANTI GRAVITY SHOES?????????

Madison: Toes. You know? They can do so many things.

Alex: *hollers at Henry* Can I smoke you? Can I ~roll you up~?

Dan: No one is banging the black mold in Bemis 2.

Antares: I either want to die busting a nut or being crushed between a pair of massive, beautiful thighs.

Henry: Anyone can cum on Fiesta

Dan: I support you. Touch your butt. Have a good time. Everyone has a butt. Everyone can have a good time.

Dan: I can't wait to be unemployable

Dan: If you just connect all our anuses with wormholes, we'll be good to go!

Patrick: Chicago was giving me the most out of any Grad School, like, 40k a year.
Federico: Oh! That's almost Linda's summer salary!

Fernando: I'd like to exit this conversation. The window is the fastest way out.

Ethan: Have you tried saying: "no u"

Amman: Man, I'm ready for this new journey. Smash a champagne bottle on the side of my head.

Kaarel: I'm not interested in necrophilia, I just think it should be legal

Dan: Wonder if they could reduce the fatty part, though. Make like a breast gravy.
Molly: Gotta use every part of the woman. That's what it's all about.

Federico: You deserve the domestic violence that you get.

Dan: Have you ever seen a Chinese baby? They all look like the Michelin Man.

Jad: Should i sniff Luna's ass?

Jad: A court in Brazil made homophobia a crime
Karina: If only they made heterosexuality a crime