SPAM Haiku 10601-10700

Move backwards to Numbers 10501-10600.


10601.
Pork philosophy
See life through a lens of SPAM
More truth than you know
--Cholesterol 300

10602.
"I love you," she said
Then went to fridge and saw SPAM
"Goodbye, forever"

--Cholesterol 300

10603.
An anachronism
Greasy pork in a tin can
Oldie but goodie

--Cholesterol 300

10604.
Vacuum-stayed decay
SPAM: to the earth's four corners
Meat missionary

--Cholesterol 300

10605.
I dreamed of riches
Fresh caviar and champagne
Ended up with SPAM

--Cholesterol 300

10606.
Designer color
SPAM: fashionable pink shade
Latest rage, trendy!

--Cholesterol 300

10607.
Bomb Saddam with pork
Better than gas, planes, or nukes
SPAM: stronger than SCUD

--Cholesterol 300

10608.
Sure-fire fund raiser
Tired of little brown cookies
Why not Girl Scout SPAM?

--Cholesterol 300

10609.
Sensory weirdness
SPAM: glistening soft and pink
An unsettling sight

--Cholesterol 300

10610.
Sick joke? Low Fat SPAM?
When fat is gone, what is left?
Selling empty cans?

--Cholesterol 300

10611.
At the ice forum
SPAM was all I had to give
They needed a puck

--Ryan the Beeky, rwkspecial@aol.com

10612.
Bologna bakeoff
The best in the world compete
I threw in some SPAM

--Ryan the Beeky, rwkspecial@aol.com

10613.
Time to pull the plug:
The e-mail addresses are
Better than the verse.

--Geoff Holme, Stan Byer-Mann@TAM_E_Y.net

10614.
Scrumptious, supple flesh
Oh, glistening corpulence!
We shall meet again...

--K-Dog, www.dot.dot.dot.w.dot.w.dave.com

10615.
Alabama SPAM.
Delicacy, "Mighty good
Eatin'," Daddy said.

--eddie erdmann, bluekid923@aol.com

10616.
Fry it Mama, fry.
Potted meat: no longer king.
SPAM has won my heart.

--eddie erdmann, bluekid923@aol.com

10617.
Wicked pink fusion
brings to mind a new meaning
to bad storm rising.

--Terry Montague, trmont@seanet.com

10618.
Spread Spam spongy specks
On front lawn, fertilizer
Why no one visits?

--Terry Montague, trmont@seanet.com

10619.
What to drink with SPAM?
Maybe a light pink chablis?
Toast with Thunderbird

--Terry Montague, trmont@seanet.com

10620.
pig toes and pig nose,
pig butts and pig guts in cans,
let's just call it "SPAM"

--John Charles Webb, Jr., johnboy@aloha.net

10621.
porky pig is SPAM
curly tail is in the can
get key, throw away

--John Charles Webb, Jr., johnboy@aloha.net

10622.
If SPAM is canned ham,
why is there SPAM in my ram?
One mouse is enough.

--John Charles Webb, Jr., johnboy@aloha.net

10623.
Wiggly pseudo-flesh
Oozing mucous-like jelly
Slides down easily

--Trout catcher, gdouglas@reputable.com

10624.
SPAM sponsors NASCAR
Two hundred five miles per hour
Flying blue SPAM tin

--Trout catcher, gdouglas@reputable.com

10625.
Used to be a key
Now dysfunctional pull tab
Finger dripping blood

--Trout catcher, gdouglas@reputable.com

10626.
SPAM, mighty warrior.
Riding on your steed of pink,
face of death to all!

--Coz

10627.
boulder on hillside
a SPAM can in my cupboard
I will move neither

--Gerard Dolan, delaco@pobox.com

10628.
"spam (n), Junk email"
- The Oxford Dictionary
True English word now.

--Jim Rugh, rugh@hotmail.com

10629.
Not bacon nor ham
It's nothing resembling beef
Just pink meat in goo

--Brad Smith, brsmithjr@hotmail.com

10630.
Harken back to days
Where tin cans of hot pink flesh
Were legal tender

--brad Smith, brsmithjr@hotmail.com

10631.
Heroin and crack
Pale in their addictiveness
To flesh in a can

--Brad Smith, brsmithjr@hotmail.com

10632.
Here I go again!
Thought I was done with Spamku,
Guess I'm addicted.

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10633.
President Clinton.
Punishment for him should be,
Can of SPAM each meal!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10634.
I work for Rhodes Bread.
Recipe for a great treat--
SPAM between Rhodes Rolls!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10635.
SPAM and Lewinsky.
They have a lot in common!
Full of fat and grease!

--Anonymous

10636.
Salty pink cubed treat.
Makes my mouth water so much.
Is it lunchtime yet?

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10637.
About to lose job!
Nothing's getting done today.
Thinking of Spamku.

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10638.
Twist the metal key
Free the oblong of joy meat
Ecstasy of lard

--Anonymous

10639.
The pinkness of SPAM
Jiggles and delights my cat
Need a new hobby

--Aum and Dublin

10640.
Analysis of
The stain on Monica's dress
Showed it to be SPAM.

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10641.
"Damn!" said Hillary,
"Where did Bill put the spiced pork?"
The grand jury knows!

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10642.
Marine field rations
Remain faithful to Hormel...
Spamper Fidelis!

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10643.
Hormela One car,
With double-overhead spams,
Slides around the track.

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10644.
There's a happy tune
Pigs sing to the harvest moon;
They call it SPAM's song.

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10645.
All around the Globe
Cheers like redundant SPAMku
Barnicled has-beens

--Howie Barnicle, GCarlin@sprintnet.not

10646.
You don't understand
Drinking and writing DO mix
Spamaholically

--Global Spam, Barnicle@want.Advertiser

10647.
Imus in the morn
It's another diaper lump
Of petrified SPAM!

--Y. Bother, HowieKaka@john.com

10648.
Bubba Bill Clinton
We're all standing behind you
Bend over and....SPAM!

--We're all behind you Bill.....Soooo...., Ben Dover

10649.
Wag The Dog all right
We know where YOUR pork belongs
In the SPAM can Bill

--Capt. SPAMERICA, and what did you do Billy Boy, Billy Boy?

10650.
More SPAM for the mill......
"Looks Like Lewinsky Blew It"
Look ma, no hands!.....Bill

--Capt. SPAMERICA, The Canned Crusader

10651.
"We've got to drop this!"
Bill was overheard to say
With his SPAM exposed

--Ankle Deep, In Spam

10652.
Dick Nixon said it
Mike Barnicle said it, too
But SPAM is just SPAM

--Spam Droppings, Mike Bar Nickle

10653.
Hippy Dippy Mike
Got "Lewinskied," "Spammed," and "canned"
Now writes graffiti

--Spam Droppings, Mike Bar Nickle

10654.
SPAM is really cool.
And you get the magic key.
We should set it free.

--Anonymous

10655.
Presidential SPAM......
Monica's the humidor
For Bubba's White Owl.

--Cigars , If you got 'em, smoke 'em

10656.
Love you Monica,
You're a nineties kind of broad.
Say, do you eat SPAM?

--My Gal Monica, You go girl!

10657.
Grand jury transcript:
SPAM breath made his dick go limp.
That's why he's so mad.

--Junkyard God

10658.
Ate SPAM together.
Improper relationship,
but there was no sex.

--Junkyard God

10659.
After sharing some
SPAM in the Oval Office
She fucked a cigar

--Junkyard God

10660.
Nibble a pink loaf
Then inhale a moist Cuban.
Arafat can wait.

--Junkyard God

10661.
Monica, cigar,
we can forgive. But not SPAM.
Impeachment hearings!

--Junkyard God

10662.
SPAM for everyone.
Heat can before opening.
SPAM is everywhere!

--Lee Malone, leemalone@aol.com

10663.
To eat or not to?
That is sure a no brainer!
SPAM is disgusting!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10664.
Mom pulls out blue can.
Says, "Look kids, it's dinnertime!"
Kids eat dog instead.

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10665.
Normally happy,
This year's Christmas morning sucked!
Stockings filled with SPAM!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

10666.
Prissy pink piglet
I wonder did you wiglet
When they sealed the lid

--KEVIN WALKER, magnison@aol.com

10667.
Little orphaned pigs
Crammed into a can and sealed
Never to be loved

--KEVIN WALKER, magnison@aol.com

10668.
It falls to the ground
"Pink elephant poop?" I asked...
......If the truth were known.....

--KEVIN WALKER, magnison@aol.com

10669.
Hormel's great sin--SPAM
All who eat it are punished
They go through Hormhell

--KEVIN WALKER, magnison@aol.com

10670.
Tastes good on the ground
I eat but why is it warm?
Pink elephants sigh

--Kevin Walker, Magnison@ aol.com

10671.
sun sets on trout stream;
hurriedly tie on new fly.
SPAM awaits at camp...

--Walldaddy, wallismatt@hotmail.com

10672.
Twist on Murphy's Law:
If anything can go bad,
My bet's on the SPAM.

--Walldaddy, wallismatt@hotmail.com

10673.
Save your stomach friend
Swallow not this gelled pink flesh
Flush it directly

--Ricosan

10674.
I just eat my SPAM
with SPAM, SPAM, more SPAM, and SPAM
and for desert: SPAM.

--Eric Idle, Idle@python.com

10675.
Shari Lewis, dead.
Never followed through on first
Idea: SPAM Chop.

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10676.
Lab results are in
on Monica's pink dress stain.
Need I tell you more?

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10677.
Khartoum officials
cry, "Bombed lab only made SPAM!"
Nuke it, just in case.

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10678.
Hormel follow-up
Team scrapes walls of Afghan caves.
"Bin Laden flavor."

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10679.
Bill: "Afghanistan
and Sudan first. Starr persists?
Minnesota next."

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10680.
Hillary, loyal
Wife, prepares SPAM lunch for Prez.
No more porked interns.

--Martin H. Booda, booda@datasync.com

10681.
It's quite a wonder
People choose to eat this meat
That's worse than tofu

--The Sheep

10682.
The thing about SPAM:
Everybody's heard of it
But few dare try it

--Craig Beresford, crbdmsb@gateway.net

10683.
SPAM on Yom Kippur
Isn't so bad after all
For spam is not food

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10684.
From light to darkness
From mere food to nuclear waste
SPAM transforms cosmos

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10685.
SPAM is edible
Two added to two makes five
Ministry of Truth

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10686.
Channel force of SPAM
Tap the dark power of pork
Adept of Despair

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10687.
Reincarnation
That tin of SPAM might contain
Adolf Hitler's soul

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10688.
Each atom of SPAM
Born in supernova's heart
A STAR DIED FOR THIS?

--Eliezer S. Yudkowsky, sentience@pobox.com

10689.
Lager, SPAM, and whelks
Suitable Skinhead diet
Fuel for hooligans

--Spud Ronin, spudr@hotmail.com

10690.
Hammer and anvil.
A million points of SPAM-Lite
The key was broken

--Neil M., enzo@outwest.net

10691.
Doorway to my soul.
The doorway to my rectum.
The key opens all.

--Neil M., enzo@outwest.net

10692.
SPAM is an awful,
Gelatinous, glutinous
Block of pig's offal.

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10693.
"Oh! SPAM! Canned you see."
National anathema
Of the porcine race.

--Barrie Collins, bcollins@comox.island.net

10694.
Do not jump on SPAM.
Dense matter. High pressure. Pink
singularity.

--Neil M., enzo@outwest.net

10695.
My pink wedding dress
Hangs in the closet like SPAM
He was such a pig

--Teaberry10@aol.com

10696.
I popped it open
The vapors started smokin'
So I fed the cat

--okdopey@aol.com

10697.
With Texture so Fine
And a Smell that's so Divine
SPAM, you are all Mine

--Cameron Farah

10698.
Pink is for sissies!
A real man takes his SPAM black--
Add logs to the fire.

--Greg Adams, BeeReb@sprynet.com

10699.
We have a death wish:
Our mausoleum is built
pink brick by pink brick.

--Erin Adams, BeeReb@sprynet.com

10700.
Pink mass in my ass:
Certainly it's SPAM, I say...
But where's my gerbil?

--Greg Adams, BeeReb@sprynet.com


Move forwards to Numbers 10701-10800.
Return to the SPAM Haiku Archive page.
John Nagamichi Cho


SPAM is a registered trademark of Hormel Foods Corporation for luncheon meat. The Haiku Archive Master and the contributors to this website have no legal, commercial or financial involvement with Hormel Foods. Neither the information presented here, nor the manner in which it has been presented, has been sanctioned by Hormel Foods.