Lodz, 20 April 1926 To the most beloved of all my beloved and the most devoted of all my devoted, Sol Zissman, and his worthy wife, Esther, Your letter, which you sent me the first day of Passover, and also a letter from Mr. Dvorkin of Toronto I received this Saturday, the 18th, and I am now answering them. I am absorbed in your letters, and read with what sort of devotion you want to help your uncle, and that up to now you are not able to help. I am left in doubt and think to myself, "Is this my destiny, is this then my fate, that iron walls stand and that we are not able to break them?" On the one hand, I accept it as something predestined, and say that I am condemned among the tens of thousands who are in distress here and have no opportunity to emigrate. On the other hand, I am refreshed and strengthened by your constantly devoted letters that call to me to have patience and confidence in you, my dearest Sol. When my letter arrives, you may already have live regards from your uncle via Mr. Anker, and maybe not because according to what he told me he is to board ship on April 24. In any event, this letter will arrive during the same week as your father-in-law! In your last letter to me, you ask for a long letter and ask that I should also write you the whole truth respecting Opoczno. Yes, my devoted child, since my letters are not yet offensive to you and you are so deeply interested in your uncle's circumstances that you always ask for a long letter, so I will try to write everything with precision and exactitude concerning my whole plan recently. In 1921, I moved back to Lodz assuming that I would be better able to make progress for myself and my children in a large city. At that time, I had a stand in the marketplace with readymade trousers and suits where I dealt for a year and accomplished nothing. Then I was with my brother-in-law, first as an employee and later as a partner at the time that you helped me with $150. I was in the partnership for two years. But these were the saddest two years of my life. I didn't have a place to live, but stayed with my wife's parents with two iron beds. Life was unbearable, as you already know from my long letters. Therefore, I constantly thought only of either freeing myself from the world or freeing the world of me, and you came forward again in 1924 and sent me $160 with which I rented the apartment for $200 and liberated myself from all my troubles and woes. During that period, the zloty began to become stabilized, i.e., the zloty was fixed at 1,800,000 marks and 5 zlotys and 18 groshen were equivalent to a dollar! I didn't have any money at that time, but I was free and not dependent on anyone. I began to deal with selling on payments, i.e., for example, I would buy a suit for 100 gulden. I would give the merchant 50 gulden in cash and 50 gulden in a two-month note. I sold it to a customer on payments. I earned 30%, i.e., I sold it for 130 zlotys; the customer handed me 20 to 30 zlotys immediately, and the balance was to be paid out over a period of ten to twelve weeks. So long as the exchange rate was stable, things were going all right. But along came Grabski and made a mess of the entire economy, and a crisis arose in the country. All the factories closed; the shops were liquidated; people fled. Wherever possible, a person saved himself; some went to Palestine; some went to Argentina. But you know who left...those who had the money to travel. And those who didn't had to sit and gaze at the heavens (thinking), "From whence will my help come?" So, what further is there to do? After all, we have to eat, and there's no way to earn a living because everything has gone to ruin. Naturally, my payment business came to an end, and I confront myself and think, what, after all, is there to do; I really don't want to go under...together with the sinking ship. I want to save myself and cannot. I seek among all of my near and dear ones, but I find no one who is prepared to interest himself with my existence. And, again, I turn my eyes to you, my devoted one, and think to myself, "Why am I hanging on to Shloyme, and why do I torment him. After all, he already has a wife and expenses, small and large." But having no alternative, I wrote you that I ask for and want no further monetary help from you. Another person in your place would have thanked G-d that his uncle asks for and wants nothing, so things must be good. But what then (did I ask of you)...to do some deals together, perhaps to sell something, mushrooms, feathers, etc. But you are too deeply involved in this and instead of my losing $3.86 on the mushrooms, you open your pocket and send me $20. Again a subsidy, and again a subsidy. But I was more interested in the help that you sent through your letters than with your subsidies. For a time, I went around as if I were confused, not able to figure out what to do. I kept thinking how I could make myself worthy for G-d to allow me to be in the same city as my nephew. I really searched, inquired whether there is a possibility, but I wasn't able to gain anything from all my battles. Everything is mixed together in my head...smuggling myself..Canada..Argentina..$500..bandits, swindlers and plain con men...until I received a letter from you that Mr. Anker is making a trip and will try to do something here for me if it's only possible. Being slightly informed as to how impossible it is to accomplish the slightest thing in Warsaw, I waited impatiently for the results of Mr. Anker's efforts. But how stunned I was to hear from Mr. Anker's mouth the word "impossible." Under the best of circumstances, I would not be able to go to America...but to Canada. I was utterly confused and replied that I was unacquainted with Canada; as to those that I have there, it is just as if I did not have them... He answered that he had no solution for me. And again I remain paralyzed, bewildered, not knowing where I am in the world. Meanwhile, the crisis in the land was growing from day to day. I didn't have anything to sell, and there was no way to earn anything. If I earn a day's living, I am a fortunate fellow, and in case I don't, no one would have reason to be envious of me. My wife is angry with me because I can't support the household, and I permitted the thought of America to enter my mind. My children cry that they don't have what they need for school, clothing, food, etc. And I become completely depressed, nervous. I don't eat, and I don't sleep, and I think constantly of how, after all, to save myself from going under... All winter, my mother, may she rest in peace, lay ill, unable to get out of bed. You remember that I wrote you a letter from her bedside with tears in my eyes. At the time, she was seriously ill, but she continued to be bedridden until the eve of the month of Nisan, i.e., on March 14, I received a telegram that I should go there. I arrived in Opoczno at 6:00 a.m., and at 9:00 p.m. my sainted, devoted mother, lying in bed, released her holy spirit, 65 years old. I arrived a bit too late, but my mother, may she rest in peace, was still able to recognize me, although she was not able to speak to me. However, when she saw me, she started to cry and, taking my hand in hers, she didn't want to let me leave her bedside until... I didn't want to write you about this in order not to cause you pain. I understand that you will shed a tear there. But what can we do, devoted child, other than to wish that we may be consoled by G-d Himself. Neither my mother nor your mother will regain life. Gone, even though a wound remains in the heart that will not heal, we must return to everyday life. I spent the whole period of mourning in Opoczno. Arriving at the train, I met Mr. Anker. Hearing the bad news, he immediately accompanied me back to the city where he gave me $10, knowing that it was five days before Passover. Returning to the city, a new plan was developed. Since my mother had passed away and there was a small inheritance, the living quarters in Kinsk as you know, my sister said that I should move back to Kinsk. My brother-in-law, Lazer, said that he is ready to help with up to $100 to do something in Lodz, and there may be $40-$50 from the inheritance; perhaps I should write a letter to your father about the whole situation that we're dealing with. On the other hand, Mr. Anker said that leaving would be best. And then I received from you the long letter written on the train in pencil on the way from Toronto in which you provided a virtual photograph of my brothers-in-law with whom we are well acquainted... And, again, I stood under a question mark and asked, "What, after all, is going to happen with that unfortunate Uncle Wolf? Will something to do turn up eventually, or am I condemned forever?" Don't think, Sol, that I didn't describe the whole situation to your father-in-law. I told him categorically that if I am destined to be a poor man, I doubt whether any of the help will be able to satisfy my hungry stomach. And as to the plan of my brother-in-law that a sum of money should be put together that will enable us to buy a bakery, I don't have a right to express myself because I don't want to take the money into my hands. I don't want to put anything into my own name because I am fearful, and I am now "putting up the last nut." A loser is afraid to ante up. I have battled and struggled enough to go to another country and to acclimate myself there so that I should not be dependent on the help of anyone else. However, since it isn't working out, my devoted child, I turn the whole matter over to you, i.e., you must decide on my fate. And whatever you do, I will comply. I turn everything over to your disposal. Come to an agreement with Uncle Lazer, with Aunt Estherl, with my brothers-in-law in Toronto, with my wife, with your father, father-in-law, and so on. And write me good advice! I send heartfelt regards to you and your dear wife. Regards to your father-in-law, mother-in-law, sisters, family, and so on. Write me about your health and business and how the season looks. Are you doing business, and what does Mr. Anker relate about Poland in general and about your uncle in particular? With respect, Your uncle, Wolf Lewkowicz My wife and children and family send heartfelt regards to you all. Adieu. Write me whether your father-in-law is back in Chicago already and how he feels after his arrival. I am enclosing a newspaper article about all hope for entering America disappearing and being abandoned by the American Senate. All material Copyright 1995 by Marshall L. Zissman and Sol J. Zissman.