Greetings from a survivor of the expedition to Morris Cave, VT, Feb 27, 1994

These are the people who went (notice the three shiny new freshman officers):

1. Greg Galperin

2. Pearl Tsai

3. Seth Webster (Lord President)

4. Kevin Knoedler

5. Lila Koumandou (Most Esteem-ed General Secretary)

6. Michael Woods (Arch-Usurer)

We met with a group of seven people from Brown at the site; some of them

were pretty cool, but I think they were a bit overwhelmed by Morris Cave.

Pearl, Seth and I (Mike) went ahead to check out the entrance. We climbed

up a steep, snow-covered incline and trudged over to a frozen pond. On the

other side a cascade poured over a cliff to crash into the pond. The two cave

entrances were left of the water fall. We entered the lower one. The

three of us had time to explore before the rest of the group entered the cave.

Some people were a bit meek about exploring at first and I enjoyed mock-

ranting/babbling that they should check out interesting passages rather than

waiting for somebody with directions to hold their hand (I was glad that we

only had a few vague clues about Morris-Who wants to know exactly what a cave

contains before seeing it themselves?) Well, there was an excellently intrepid

group leading (as I *do* say so myself, <grin>), anyway. Seth, Pearl, and

Zach (from Brown) were terriffic caving partners. Our group of thirteen was

strewn along the tunnels, with Kevin, Greg, and Lila keeping people from

falling too far behind in the rear.

Nothing could stop our push forward, into the cave, not even the "frisbe-

sized hole" (that person from Brown had a real gift for exaggeration). We

did have some trouble when Pearl discoved the section of passage which was a

sump. Pearl and I tried to siphon and to bail the water out, all the while

laughing at the positions we were assuming to accomplish this, and loudly

exchanging bits of innuendo for the purpose of entertaining the others who,

being further back in the passage, were unable to see just what was going on.

We had trouble maneuvering the siphon, moreover it seemed like the water was

draining back into the sump from where we dumped it. We abandonned that course

of action.

I examined the hole; the distance from the water's surface to the roof of

the crawlspace(this term is misleading, as it suggests a much larger opening)

was perhaps six inches at its maximum. It looked like it opened into a larger

chamber pretty soon after this tight squeeze. So I let insanity have its way

with me, and I announced that I was going through. Only Pearl and Seth really

could see what I was up to; everyone else was further back in the passage

listening for news from us. I removed some of my clothing. I lay down on my

back in front of the hole. I leaned my head into the cold water, and then my

shoulders. The I began clawing at the roof and kicking hard with my heels at

the floor, pushing into the water. I thought I was pinned for a moment as

some loose rocks under my back acted like shims to wedge me in. I thrashed

and wriggled, afraid that I would get a mouthfull of water and start to choke

(probably, my body was enough to have made the water level rise uncomfortably).

Finally I worked my shoulders and chest free, and I kept kicking and writhing

till my legs were, also. Ahh, I was in a room large enough to allow me to

crouch as I shivered and cursed, yelling to the others that I had made it to a

goddamned chamber, where it was goddamned big enough to goddamned crouch in

and they better get the hell through the hole after me 'cause I had done it

and they had damn well better try, too. Pardon, I became rather outspoken

after so much excitement. It must be all that pleasure that makes me swear

when I'm caving. <wan smile>

Eventually, everyone came through alright. The next obstacle, aside from

being cold and wet, was a tight squeeze just before the cave's large room.

We climbed to the highest point in the chamber individually and in small

groups. It was a bit slippery at places. We saw the "nifty waterfall" , but

unless we were not looking well enough it looked more like a small shower.

I was feeling a little worn out, but I'm glad that Seth was gung-ho enough

to set a hand-line, and to lead the way down the mud slide. The lake was

really wonderful; it was clear as glass except for the isolated patches of foam

which floated on the surface.

We did not see everything there was to see in this cave. This disappoints

me because I know that when time has smoothed the memories of this trip, and I

stop having flashbacks, I will have to go back to Morris and see it all.

Leaving the cave was interesting. I had offered to leave the cave first

to go warm up the car. My wet hair froze instantly upon emerging. The strands

of hair made noise as they clanked together. I skillfully leapt, descended,

and ran to the car, though to the untrained eye, it may have seemed as if I

were slipping on ice, falling down a hill and tripping through the snow

while freezing to death. Reaching the vehicle, I casually removed my wet

gloves and some gear and sauntered to the door (ok, so I wasn't really that

calm and methodical about it) and worked to open it. My fingers stuck to the

door and the keys; I pulled my hand away from the door before any real damage

could be done though. Finally, I managed to get in, the put the key in the

ignition the *right* way, and to sit and wait for the heat to thaw me. I'm

sure everyone else experienced as much ecstacy as I upon emerging from the

cave into the clear, crisp, bitterly !@#%&* cold air of a Vermont evening.

It was an excellent trip;

friends ask me why I don't

like them anymore when I tell

them they should go caving.

Michael Woods

Sort of Treasurer