SPAM Haiku 12301-12400

Move backwards to Numbers 12201-12300.

12301.
Load SPAM in chamber
Fire into the P.E.T.A. crowd
Eject hot blue can

--SgtGunny, Sgtgunny1@aol.com

12302.
One more family
Mourns at graveside; the large blue
Casket is lowered

--Mil-dot, blackbag@the-pentagon.com

12303.
Forty people dead
Not my fault ... Neighbor's SPAM can
Told me to do it

--Mil-dot, blackbag@the-pentagon.com

12304.
Car rolls at snail's pace
Automatic weapons fire
SPAM dies on sidewalk

--Mil-Dot, blackbag@the-pentagon.com

12305.
The lamp is shattered
A mother's justice passed down
SPAM sent to corner

--El Grego Magnifico, snipersnest@the-pentagon.com

12306.
FBI surrounds
Demands for hostages made
SPAM in unmarked cans

--El Grego Magnifico, snipersnest@the-pentagon.com

12307.
Pull key off the side
Throw blue can into the crowd
SPAM grenade explodes

--SgtGunny, Sgtgunny1@aol.com

12308.
Husband strays from home
Picks up SPAM on street corner
Vice cops make arrest

--SgtGunny, Sgtgunny1@aol.com

12309.
I got mail today
Unabomber sent me SPAM
Pork blew my arms off

--El Grego Magnifico, snipersnest@the-pentagon.com

12310.
SPAM's sex appeal...gone
Along with the Bloomer Girls--
What have we come to?

--Lance Reventny, Lance@cannet.com

12311.
Marinate your SPAM
In one hundred proof Vodka--
Drink the marinade.

--Stuporbowl Spunch, Fellows of the ovoid thing

12312.
SPAM IS history
The heroine of all meats--
Treat her with kindness

--Loretta Forgetta, Lfmst@ham.edu

12313.
The Maltese SPAM chunk
Holds the secrets of mankind...
Do you want the leg?

--Bogart D. Byrd

12314.
entire country eats--
pork? eternal SPAMnation
inevitable

--kevin, the mathineer, mathineer@primary.net

12315.
SPAM can filled with soil
Flower glistens with dew drops
Life from porcine death

--Amanda

12316.
spam is a spiced ham
spam spam the wonderful ham
a marvelous shape

--Anonymous

12317.
Is everyone SPAM
What is this SPAM all about
Was it made to rule

--ICEcreamMAN77, ICEcreamMAN77@webtv.net

12318.
I ceased eating SPAM
The same day I stopped drinking
Coincidence--NOT!

--Rick Hansen, rick.hansen@newsedge.com

12319.
I like SPAM a lot
I am writing this for school
DO you like it, thanks

--Joe, senno52@yahoo.com

12320.
Let the SPAM in pigs
be rested to find new SPAM
so the SPAM evolves.

--BIG DADDIEZ

12321.
Prepare your stomach.
Pink slice of dense mystery;
Heartburn awaits you.

--billybob, billybob@tumon.com

12322.
Knife cuts through sickly,
Texture startles my senses.
Put it in my mouth?

--billybob, billybob@tumon.com

12323.
Slimy, yet solid,
Disgustingly intriguing--
Glistening SPAM mass.

--teeny

12324.
Her deep mystery,
Mottled pinkness quivering
Still perplexes me

--billybob, billybob@tumon.com

12325.
Pigs die to make ham.
Do they live to make some SPAM?
It looks like live pig!

--squinky, squinky@cyberdude.com

12326.
Mother fed me SPAM;
I considered it abuse.
Now I love the stuff.

--adult, totoguam@usa.net

12327.
Noodle dish with SPAM:
Shovel SPAM chunks to the side,
Eat the cabbage bits.

--billybob, billybob@tumon.com

12328.
Can it be so bad?
Yes, it most certainly can.
Now I am barfing!

--Tim Landry

12329.
Monica gave Bill
gifts. But once he received SPAM.
Do you not love me?

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12330.
Infamous cigar.
After being used, it reeked
pungently like SPAM.

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12331.
Bill said, "I did not
eat SPAM with that woman, Miss
Lewinsky. Yeah...right.

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12332.
Senate Trial starts
to see if eating SPAM is
a misdemeanor.

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12333.
There's talk of censure,
because SPAM-loving leftists
think SPAM is OK.

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12334.
Dry cleaners wondered
if substance on blue dress was
SPAMicidal Gel.

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12335.
Scientists still are
not sure whether DNA
was of Bill or swine.

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12336.
Monica wanted
to eat Bill's meat, he said no.
Bill ate all the SPAM.

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12337.
Kenneth Starr hates SPAM.
He was forced to eat it as
a young child...poor kid.

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12338.
Bill and Monica
in the Oval Office--they
eat SPAM together.

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12339.
Linda Tripp suggests
that Monica should tape their
private SPAM eatings.

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12340.
I wrote a haiku
and this is the day I rue
'cuz I loathe haiku.

--REB

12341.
Perfectly packaged,
Pseudo-meat beckoning me
Coyly from the shelf.

--Leslie Smith, totoguam@usa.net

12342.
Clad in lovely blue,
Hints of the goodness inside
Until it's opened.

--Leslie Smith, totoguam@usa.net

12343.
Her tempting secret,
Mottled pinkness quivering,
Still perplexes me.

--billybob, billybob@tumon.com

12344.
Curvaceous, pale, smooth
She's desperately desired.
But not on MY plate.

--billybob, billybob@tumon.com

12345.
I don't like SPAM. I
Think it tastes really bad. This
Is one bad haiku.

--Anonymous

12346.
Saturday morning
Oblong slabs hit the pan....SSSSS
Kids wake up, sniff....MMMMM

--John Nicholson, nicholsoja@musc.edu

12347.
We rationalize:
That pink meat is surreal, but...
What would Porky think?

--John Nicholson, nicholsoja@musc.edu

12348.
Brave progenitors
of avant-garde Spam-ku form,
what were you thinking?

--John Nicholson, nicholsoja@musc.edu

12349.
Casino gambler?
SPAM roulette. Take one new can
and one old. Select!

--Dealu21

12350.
Crack the can open
Jell-O on top, glistening
Splats out of the can

--BFarringer@aol.com

12351.
Teletubbies romp
On fields of SPAM and daisies
Unfortunate fall

--BFarringer@aol.com

12352.
Les pièces de porc
Fusionnent en quelque
Chose de merveilleux

--Watt_U_Louquinette@titude.problem

12353.
Me: "Like your SPAMku!"
But she heard "Like to spank you!"
Now I'm a sex pest!

--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@tcam.com

12354.
Bill was aquitted.
Sends message to SPAM lovers
That SPAM is OK.

--CaptainObvious, CaptainObvious@rocketmail.com

12355.
Here in Africa,
Food's not the same. It's here, SPAM,
That I long for you.

--Al, almc@geocities.com

12356.
Do not build your tem-
ple from pink chunks of pork com-
pressed like fiberboard.

--Joy-Lily, fiberjoy@dnai.com

12357.
what's with these haiku?
do you people have a life?
top choice grade A meat!

--allison white

12358.
SPAM can be your friend
Pink sentinel in the night
Calling you homeward

--Jamie Combs, Ophelia539@aol.com

12359.
A Tower Of Cans
Your Village In Its Shadow
A Folder of Plans

--Anonymous

12360.
Chocolate sculpture.
Eaten by some prick. Now I
use SPAM for all art.

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12361.
Originally
Se7en's "glutton" ate SPAM. This
was just too gritty.

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12362.
SPAM Paranoia.
Suspect that my haiku are
unoriginal.

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12363.
Yes, marijuana
can be smoked using a SPAM
tin and a biro.

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12364.
I wanted to be
inspired. So I ate some SPAM.
Now I'm out of space.

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12365.
It is kind of dumb.
To write haiku in English.
Syllables are wrong!

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12366.
Oh shit! I forgot
what I was going to write.
Short-term SPAMku loss.

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12367.
Which of us is more
pathetic? Writer? Reader?
SPAMku depression.

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12368.
Sometimes they're frequent.
Some months submissions dwindle.
SPAMku ebbs and flows.

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12369.
hell in a blue can
a pink, slimy inferno
it is deviled SPAM

--Anonymous

12370.
SPA and M?
protection of animals?
an oxymoron

--Anonymous

12371.
spongy soft substance
just like a stomach lining
melts in my tummy

--Anonymous

12372.
the key, where's the key?
a tab is just not the same
intense nostalgia

--Anonymous

12373.
can on can on can
a blue wall goes up in air
it's The Tin Curtain

--Anonymous

12374.
I cut my finger
I open a can of SPAM
strangely similar

--Anonymous

12375.
I just sold my soul
A lifetime supply of SPAM
Hormelian deal

--Anonymous

12376.
SPAM as a weapon
bounces easily off foe
should have left in can

--Anonymous

12377.
SPAM tokoroten
Japanese monks flee in fright
meat noodles of death

--Anonymous

12378.
Rita Hayworth croons
Gilda making her man squirm
Put the blame on Spame

--Anonymous

12379.
Eerie silence falls.
Okay it's not that eerie.
I merely eat SPAM.

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12380.
The key is pull-ed.
Nostrils flare in unison
Foreplay in a tin.

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12381.
Freud was not correct.
Human motivation is:
Thantos. Eros. SPAM.

--Alex, alexh@ivanhoe.starway.net.au

12382.
SPAM with my breakfast;
SPAM with my lunch and dinner;
SPAM in my nightmares.

--SBookner

12383.
Trailer park sunset
My unwashed bowling shirt glows
A familiar pink

--Bill Turner, turnerwm@geocities.com

12384.
Green Midget Café:
The Management regret that
SPAM is off--SORRY!

--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@tcam.com

12385.
Used to eat it lots
Now I'm gainfully employed
Don't eat it no more

--Tim Sanner, sanner_t@prodigy.net

12386.
SPAMBURGER on grill?
You've got to be kidding me
Let's cook some real meat

--Tim Sanner, sanner_t@prodigy.net

12387.
After many moons
SPAMku urge takes hold again
I am back to work

--Sandra Seaman

12388.
SPAM beckons to me,
Calling its dirty verse in
Julie Andrews' voice.

--Sandra Seaman

12389.
Every bite I take
spells out my desire: SPAM!! Why
eat Alphaghetti?

--Sandra Seaman

12390.
Finished for the night,
off to sleep and have sweet dreams,
sweetest dreams of SPAM.

--Sandra Seaman

12391.
Oh yes, she tempts me
Devil with a blue dress on
SPAM comes in a can?

--HAiku Master, etrumpet1@aol.com

12392.
a shiny blue can
there's a strange, pale, sticky gel
lunch today is SPAM

--Dennis , windigrwin@aol.com

12393.
Odor reaches nose
And chunks of animal fat
SPAM in my e-mail

--Digger, windigrwin@aol.com

12394.
Aliens invade!
Our tanks fire shells filled with SPAM,
Aliens repelled!

--Jeffery Scharn, ironbar@jps.net

12395.
What sort of product
could evoke such poetry?
I've never had it.

--badtoad-san, badtoad@asu.edu

12396.
Tinsel Town premiere:
Porky on a Hot Tin Roof.
Canned, but panned. Alas.

--Gollum, ndu75@airmail.net

12397.
SPAM is my nectar.
Haiku flows from my fingers.
I am immortal.

--Anonymous

12398.
SPAMBURGER! SPAM! ...Add
a little SPAM... Add a lot
of taste...but lose friends.

--Anonymous

12399.
Sitting on toilet
After obligatory
SPAM meal. Is this love?

--Anonymous

12400.
I realy love SPAM,
The only thing is, even
My dog won't eat SPAM.

--Jon Krause, Krause27@earthlink.net