SPAM Haiku 12401-12500

Move backwards to Numbers 12301-12400.

12401.
SPAM is right for me,
and SPAM is right for you, but
not for the old guys.

--Jon Krause, Krause27@earthlink.net

12402.
I was sitting at
work, and suddenly... I saw
a sign--it said SPAM.

--Jon Krause, Krause27@earthlink.net

12403.
SPAM SPAM SPAM what have
you got? Just your little can,
to sit from and watch.

--Jon Krause, krause27@earthlink.net

12404.
I was at the best
Bar, and suddenly I saw
It. A small SPAM can.

--Jon Krause, krause27@earthlink.net

12405.
It was just sitting
right there, not causing any
fuss. But he ate it.

--Jon Krause, krause27@earthlink.net

12406.
I forgive you SPAM,
You Clinton of the lunch meats--
Go and sin no more.

--Arkansas Zipper Man, Noone@nowhere.com

12407.
Handy stuff that SPAM,
It's right up there with duct tape--
Ouch! said the gerbil.

--Arkansas Zipper Man, Noone@nowhere.com

12408.
SPAM, I have craved you
Deep in salivary glands
A burst of spittle!

--lauri

12409.
Ex-pig, hot-pink ears,
Quivering clammy gray food,
Smack it on Oreo.

--Gary Vineyard, JGVineyard@aol.com

12410.
What is SPAM made of?
Whatever it is, it's good!
SPAM is very good.

--bman, Bobhill@hotmail.com

12411.
Aroma enchants
Sweet smell of honeysuckle
No, SPAM in my pants!

--Bill(Pooh Bear Foo)

12412.
Just noticed this site
Love to eat spam on the net...
Now my keyboard does

--Bill(Pooh Bear Foo), I love this site!

12413.
Paste me with pink loaf
I yearn for a salty treat
I gleam with pork fat

--Lynda Hallmark, lgh6@columbia.edu

12414.
Taboo use of SPAM
Feed it to bratty children
Olson Twins, beware

--Rev. Chris, chrisdeneen@mindspring.com

12415.
Linda, are you mad?!
Get that SPAM out of your mouth.
Besides, you're Jewish.

--Rev. Chris, chrisdeneen@mindspring.com

12416.
Got a long road trip?
SPAM will help make the trip fun!
Oil up the bodies.

--Anonymous

12417.
Tibia shavings
Tortured, anointed with gel
Served to the army

--Matt Clenott

12418.
Fry me to a crisp
I am best if used by June
Two thousand seven

--Matt Clenott

12419.
Hormel attorneys
Warn of dire consequences
Should this continue

--Matt Clenott

12420.
So much disrespect!
You think you're too good for me?
Am I chopped liver?

--Matt Clenott

12421.
Candlelight and wine
The greasy slab shimmers pink
Anticipation

--Matt Clenott

12422.
SPAM all you can eat
Gorging pink pork cubes in sauce
Vomitorium

--Hugh Mongous, thyroid@ix.netcom.com

12423.
Lament empty can.
Burp. Belch. Grease stain on t-shirt.
Not bad Friday night.

--John Barrett, barrettj@cch.com

12424.
Three empty SPAM cans
Rattle across the truckbed
Of my trusty Ford.

--Eric M. Christiansen

12425.
To love SPAM and PEZ
Delicacies to enjoy
Foods of mystery

--Mo in Madison

12426.
The problem Brutus,
Lies but not within the stars
But within the SPAM.

--robert, robbieheath@hotmail.com

12427.
Toy with my tastebuds
Insult my brain, yet again
Hunger devours thoughts

--Trixie

12428.
SPAM, glorious SPAM,
Better than the perfect ham
Encased in the can.

--Rose Cain, bkltprncs

12429.
Always SPAM I eat
Every recipe a treat
Will be ralphing you

--Bob Choderker

12430.
to get the T-shirt
i must eat a can of SPAM?
forget the T-shirt

--robbie, robbieheath@hotmail.com

12431.
What is this pink crap?
I ponder this as I stare
At the processed meat.

--Anonymous

12432.
SPAM, wonderful SPAM.
You sit and jiggle as the
wind blows over you.

--Anonymous

12433.
The girl is fed SPAM
SPAM, the processed, rancid meat
Is this her last meal?

--Anonymous

12434.
They stare at the plate.
God only knows what it is.
The pink mass jiggles.

--Anonymous

12435.
My God, look at it!
It's headed straight for us, help!
False alarm, it's SPAM.

--Anonymous

12436.
O, here comes the meat,
The terrible processed meat,
SPAM will save the day!

--Anonymous

12437.
Blue SPAM monolith
Imperturbably awaits
Glorious rebirth.

--Eric M. Christiansen, zenhouse@earthlink.net

12438.
Pink light through window?
'Tis the east, and Juliet
is the...is the.....SPAM?!?

--S. Bookner

12439.
El SPAM-o es mal.
Mas mal que mi español.
(Y eso es mal.)

--S. Bookner

12440.
Black holes are awesome.
Not even light can escape.
SPAM is expelled, though.

--S. Bookner

12441.
Not-so-famous lines:
"'Twas a dark and SPAMMY night.
Suddenly, he puked."

--S. Bookner

12442.
Here's a tough challenge:
Watch Barney while eating SPAM.
Purple/pink nightmare.

--S. Bookner

12443.
Eat SPAM while biking.
Which is worse in your stomach?
Handlebars or SPAM?

--S. Bookner

12444.
Play SPAMopoly.
Visit Barfwalk and Puke Place.
Get out of gel free.

--S. Bookner

12445.
Wheel of Misfortune:
Game show with a SPAM-based theme.
Wanna buy a bowel?

--S. Bookner

12446.
A scarecrow eats SPAM.
If he only had a brain,
he would starve instead.

--S. Bookner

12447.
What am I doing
I'm s'posed to be a poet
God damn you SPAM-Ku

--Lorelei

12448.
early morning words
with a cherry flower breath's
enlightening me

--navest kamber, rebacek@yahoo.com

12449.
Post-beach hunger pangs
Oshima's neon welcomes
"SPAM sushi special"

--Hawaiian memories

12450.
east meets west at noon
a green leaf bed, blackened SPAM
with silken tofu

--Hawaiian memories

12451.
two eggs any style
with Portuguese sausage or
pineapple-glazed SPAM

--Hawaiian memories

12452.
last vacation night
a fiery sunset becomes
wedge of coral SPAM

--Hawaiian memories

12453.
The meal of Hormel
Horror meal in all vision
I run porcelain

--Common Trog

12454.
Teletubby games
Stuff SPAM in every sphincter
Watch their butts explode

--BFarringer@aol.com

12455.
Seven fat guys drank
And staunchly defended SPAM
Then I burned their shoes

--BFarringer@aol.com

12456.
Play me like a game
Toss me into tubs of SPAM
Show me how to pee

--BFarringer@aol.com

12457.
Why oh why must I
Sell my soul to Barney now
When SPAM's what I know

--BFarringer@aol.com

12458.
Flotillas of nuns
Tried to make lists of weird names
But instead ate SPAM

--BFarringer@aol.com

12459.
Rapists stormed the streets
Looking for dead chinchillas
While wearing SPAM pants

--BFarringer@aol.com

12460.
Heavy metal SPAM
Children playing dominoes
Cleveland loves cleavage

--BFarringer@aol.com

12461.
New bedtime story:
Snow White and the seven SPAMs.
Prince Charming, beware.

--S. Bookner

12462.
One, two, three, and four.
I don't want no SPAM no more.
Five, six, seven, eight. (if haiku had 4 lines, this would end great)

--S. Bookner

12463.
What Rhett really said:
"Frankly my dear, I don't give
a SPAM." They cut it.

--teeny

12464.
Oh no, you've been tricked.
It's not a burger, it SPAM!
You await your fate.

--BILLY BOB JOE

12465.
Night unfurls splendor
Surrender your darkest dreams
SPAM--grasp it, sense it

--Phantom of the SPAM, Deerjager

12466.
Monica gave Bill
A warm SPAM Spem enema--
Anal oral sex.

--Elizia Knough, elizlikarug@night.com

12467.
Monica Queen SPAM:
She's a good old boy's good girl--
Full luscious hot lips.

--T. Kennedy, GlubGlub@bridge.nonet

12468.
Don't knock the SPAM boys,
We may have to eat it cold--
Y2K's coming.

--Francis A. Nasticountry, Weewee@eifel.not

12469.
Have a SPAM banquet...
Who to invite? What to wear?
Clintons. Black tie, tails.

--Rose Cain, bkltprncs@aol.com

12470.
Years of eating it...
Diligent efforts pay off:
Home made of SPAM cans.

--Rose Cain, bkltprncs@aol.com

12471.
The sweet promised land
With milk and honey flowing--
To wash down canned SPAM.

--Ubetcha Rass, Ustaeat@night.not

12472.
Cold staring fragments
Once quivering roadkill shards--
Emotionless....still.

--Margot DeHives, scratchie@itchinutz.com

12473.
You got HCV?
Better not chomp on the SPAM--
It's hepatoxic.

--HCV ?, Go To Hep Central...http://hepatitis-central.com/

12474.
Steaming pink quiver,
Heater blows cold porcine fumes.
All-SPAM anti-freeze.

--Spankin' Sammy, rmorgis@xnet.com

12475.
Betty the Yeti
Sits squatting on her haunches
SPAM clings to her maw

--Camus, kokyuho@yahoo.com

12476.
pork and other parts
stuck between my crooked teeth
mommy take me home

--MILHOUSE

12477.
stop teasing me SPAM!
your blue can is unfunny
and I'm sensitive

--MILHOUSE

12478.
life is beautiful
with my girlfriend on my left
and SPAM in my pants

--MILHOUSE

12479.
Many spankerchiefs
will never meet their maker.
SPAM conquers the hand.

--MILHOUSE

12480.
oh holy SPAM-gods!
I bow to your processed loins
not unlike head-cheese

--MILHOUSE

12481.
butter and whole wheat
welfare cheese and a hot grill
the difference? - SPAM

--MILHOUSE

12482.
SPAM, oh SPAM, oh SPAM
why you do this to a man
who worships your can

--MILHOUSE

12483.
the cold and the snow
the icy pond turns to fun
when I wear SPAM-skates

--MILHOUSE

12484.
pager goes BEEP! BEEP!
and you KNOW I'll call you back
SPAM needs some booty

--MILHOUSE

12485.
I need a plunger
there's a big-ass hunk of SPAM
stuck in the toilet

--MILHOUSE

12486.
though I love hot-fudge
NEVER try a SPAM sundae
without the sprinkles

--MILHOUSE

12487.
like the smell of farts
a freshly cracked can of SPAM
is a cherished friend

--MILHOUSE

12488.
The flag flies above
The morning drive-thru breakfast
I buy SPAM biscuit

--Dr. Fritz, docfritz@aol.com

12489.
I am early for
The Monday morning meeting
Please feed me more SPAM

--Dr. Fritz, docfritz@aol.com

12490.
foodstuff and hammer
convenient tin has spam
ergonomic food

--technope@netscape.net

12491.
Open the can now
If you want to be thirsty
The rest of the day.

--Matt Clenott

12492.
Cry little pink friend.
Only dark skies 'round the bend,
Your pain will ne'er end.

--Albert The Dog

12493.
You scream without sound
You can't run from the abuse
Suffer silent SPAM

--Albert The Dog

12494.
Fire and the demons,
not what should be feared in hell,
only SPAM scares me.

--Albert the dog

12495.
Apocalypse comes.
What will I eat? Foods all gone.
Except SPAM and bums.

--Albert the dog

12496.
Demon! Flee from me!
Because I have a Bible,
and a can of SPAM.

--Albert the dog

12497.
Ghandi on a strike.
Why won't the great leader eat?
He only has SPAM.

--Albert the dog

12498.
Feared in the Mid East,
Indiscriminate killer,
The mighty SPAM mine.

--Albert the dog

12499.
Green field of summer
Puffy clouds take shape in sky
Looks like SPAM to me

--Dr. Fritz, docfritz@aol.com

12500.
Is it an art form
Or just another excuse
To contemplate SPAM?

--Dr. Fritz, docfritz@aol.com