SPAM Haiku 6401-6500

Move backwards to Numbers 6301-6400.

6401.
Oh blue can divine,
Your heavenly contents will
Outlast the cosmos.

--[Cool] Courtney Rand, Former Vegetarian, SPAM Acolyte

6402.
drape bright kite color
across spring's rolling green wave
two hands on spam can

--Jacob Jesus Escapé, frederic@kuhub.cc.ukans.edu

6403.
death was not too much
for casual scientists
who dared to clone SPAM.

--avo lowe

6404.
spam musical fails
march madness...too eclectic
songs of six sick pigs

--Jacob Jesus Escapé, frederic@kuhub.cc.ukans.edu

6405.
Pray around the can
Together with my SPAM friends
We have lubricant

--M.W.Wild T.

6406.
The ghosts of SPAM past,
present, and future arrive
to feast upon Scrooge.

--WRKSOFFART

6407.
Were Jesus' last words
"Please don't make me eat of this,
Just crucify me!!!"?

--Wild T.

6408.
Therapy brought back
Memories of the blue can
SPAM abuse repressed

--M.W.Wild T.

6409.
I hate to eat SPAM
My mother made us eat it
Cold or hot, it's gross!

--Anonymous

6410.
Oh can of blue near
Low sodium will not do
Extra gel for you

--Anonymous

6411.
SPAM gravy on bread
perfect gourmet finish to
trailer skirting fête

--Bill Davis, wdavis6970@aol.com

6412.
SPAM can in garbage:
Sanitation worker notes,
"Thought I had it tough."

--Bill Davis, wdavis6970@aol.com

6413.
SPAM, original
school lunchroom mystery meat.
Accept no other.

--Bill Davis, wdavis6970@aol.com

6414.
I, out of dog food,
gave some SPAM to Doberman.
Thirty-three stitches.

--Bill Davis, wdavis6970@aol.com

6415.
Monkey Spanking Boy
Sits at his screen and eats SPAM
Is this really life?

--MSB

6416.
Making the long strokes
Turning the key, can't wait to
Drop my load of SPAM

--MSB

6417.
Jelly on my hands
Slapping pink meat in my palms
SPAMasturbation

--MSB

6418.
Only seven hairs
Beat the bishop in the can
Allowance for SPAM

--MSB

6419.
Marsha, Jan, Cindy
A SPAM they will never know
Alice gets revenge

--WRKSOFFART

6420.
My dog licks his balls
and rolls around in road kill
yet will not eat SPAM.

--M.W.Wild T.

6421.
Eat by candle light
Blow up doll and a blue can
Hormel romantic

--M.W.Wild T.

6422.
SPAM on a shingle
Fill the bathrooms with students
Does no one bring lunch?

--M.W.Wild T.

6423.
What would Darwin say
Does SPAM make the theory of
De-evolution?

--M.W.Wild T.

6424.
Up your ass motor-
cycle man, I am the SPAM,
don't you understand?

--Frogwash

6425.
Little ducky feet
Rain on a sidewalk of SPAM
Face down in vomit

--WILD T.

6426.
Love indigestion
Hormel's intestine cleaner
Burn through my colon

--WILD T.

6427.
Getting all caught up
Do I have SPAM in my lungs
Or some other phlegm

--WILD T.

6428.
Garbage bags full of
the SPAM I used to make love--
That kid just ain't right.

--WILD T.

6429.
Adam, Socrates,
Mickey Mouse never ate SPAM
or maybe they did.

--WILD T.

6430.
How does SPAM get here
Places not meant to house SPAM
Finish the laundry

--WILD T.

6431.
Take a walk on the
Wild side and the SPAM all sing
Do-Do-Do again

--WRKSOFFART

6432.
Hey don't be alarmed
We're only the garbage men
We won't steal your SPAM

--WILD T.

6433.
Monkey Spanking Boy
Stroke your SPAM in the kitchen
Don't step in that stuff

--MSB

6434.
Monkey Spanking Boy
Hot pink cube that are well oiled
Making SPAM gravy

--MSB

6435.
Green and unclean. How
mean to be seen. Green and un-
clean. Green eggs and SPAM.

--mark andersen, 0206043@acad.nwmissouri.edu

6436.
son of spam. slayer
of pork. sharp edge on can. spam.
son of spam killer.

--mark andersen, 0206043@acad.nwmissouri.edu

6437.
Opening the can,
I find the layer of ooze,
rubbing it on me.

--Anonymous

6438.
pigs at the slop trough
slurp at the rubbish with glee
but won't eat SPEOPLE

--Anonymous

6439.
Oh...the lost SPAM key
Pull the ring like a grenade
Run...I get the runs

--Reece McClung, nmcclung@goucher.edu

6440.
I devour the SPAM.
My gut sounds a symphony.
Toilet overflows.

--tsquared

6441.
SPAM and eggs on toast:
Breakfast of champions, no?
We eat to grow strong!

--Anonymous

6442.
SPAM is tasty stuff
It is very nutritious
Impossible bluff

--Jason Feltham

6443.
SPAM is tasty stuff,
It is very nutritious.
Have you seen my pills?

--Jason Feltham

6444.
My hands are like SPAM
Both contain flesh and some bone,
Some nail and knuckle

--Jason Feltham

6445.
If SPAM were made with
Poultry, beef, fish, or reptile;
Whaddya mean, "IF"?

--Jason Feltham

6446.
SPAM pink eaten love
White trembling on pork lipline
Warm SPAM cold cut um...

--Andy Loewy

6447.
Shed your tin skin! Then,
O squishy pink brick--raw, my
Tonsils lubricate...

--Marvin Long, Jr., marvin@fc.net

6448.
Protein in the SPAM
It's a strange anomaly
Monkey Spanking Boy

--MSB

6449.
Eating with no thought.
Porcelain enlightenment.
No think, therefore SPAM.

--tsquared

6450.
Played sick to stay home
Mom gave me fried SPAM for lunch
Not playing sick now

--Son of FDH

6451.
Jesus given choice
By SPAM or crucifixion
"Would a God eat SPAM?"

--BSM

6452.
In the sight of God
SPAM's an abomination
"But, I'm not a God"

--BSM

6453.
Crucified and dead
Ascension after three days
"I am the GODSPAM"

--BSM

6454.
Monkey Spanking Boy
Don't bogart that SPAM, my friend
When the SPAM is passed

--MSB

6455.
Pretend you are sick
Silly Monkey Spanking Boy
Roll another SPAM

--MSB

6456.
Got busted again
Jelly dripping from your SPAM
Monkey Spanking Boy

--MSB

6457.
Monkey Spanking Boy
What's the monkey that you SPAM
"I SPAM macaque, son"

--son of MSB

6458.
On the seventh day
God played a joke on the world
And created SPAM.

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6459.
SPAM, oh dearest SPAM
I feel love's in our future
For I love to hate.

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6460.
Slaughter some large pigs
Take the unusable parts
Grind them, call it SPAM

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6461.
Chunks of processed meat
Leap in my mouth forcefully
"SPAM," I moan, grateful

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6462.
I recently ate
Food from the man on the moon
Not as strange as SPAM

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6463.
Guitars gently weep
And when SPAM tries to digest
So does your colon.

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6464.
I had a nightmare
I was young and given SPAM
"Goody!" I cried out

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6465.
My mouth often aches
For the mass of meat called SPAM
But my bowels cry.

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6466.
Compressed meat product
A little gel and a can
My God, what a waste

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6467.
SPAM on the counter
Oh, Lord, I have eaten it
Hey, I've been drinking

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6468.
There is a strange sound
An odd sucking, slurping sound
SPAM exits the can

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6469.
I'm in a nightmare
I am being force-fed SPAM
Somebody slap me

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6470.
The meat I'm eating
Is covered in gelatin
And tastes real salty.

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6471.
The twist key for SPAM
Would be very annoying
If I ate the crap.

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6472.
With passion I hate
The rubbery mass of SPAM
And that vilest gel.

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6473.
When young, I took pills
To quell my heart condition
I ate SPAM a lot

--Uncle Jay, grandiosity@hotmail.com

6474.
How appropriate,
"Arteriosclerosis"
In a SPAM haiku.

--RE:729

6475.
Hoffa, Earhart, Bierce.
Where are they? What mystery?
SPAM cans tell no tales.

--tsquared

6476.
Screaming in horror,
"If Soylent Green is people...
My God, what is SPAM!"

--tsquared

6477.
Ad agency man
secretly loathes consumer.
Sells slick SPAM campaign.

--tsquared

6478.
The escaped convict
to throw the hounds from his trail,
rubs feet with SPAM-FREE!

--tsquared

6479.
Their swords forbidden,
shamed samurai open cans
commit SPAMmuku.

--tsquared

6480.
Fry pan sizzling grease
Unforgettable odor
Over easy SPAM

--Anonymous

6481.
Boasting purebred SPAM
Crumpled aluminum can
Wrapped in torn label

--Anonymous

6482.
popping grease waiting
scoop the slimy pork bolus
god what have i done

--Anonymous

6483.
Evolution or
Creation. How did SPAM start.
Eternity waits.

--Son of FDH

6484.
Primordial ooze
Covers the SPAM but is it
Darwin or Devine

--Son of FDH

6485.
SPAM evolution
Freely taught to my children
Could God create SPAM

--Son of FDH

6486.
Evolution or
Creation the SPAM debate
Only Hormel knows

--Son of FDH

6487.
Darwin and the Church
Shall finally come to see
That the SPAM just is

--Son of FDH

6488.
The young novice asked
"Give me koan to ponder."
"SPAM," replied master.

--tsquared

6489.
"Let my people go!"
The Pharaoh laughed in reply
Lo!, A plague of SPAM.

--tsquared

6490.
My uncle died young,
died of consumption they say.
He ate only SPAM.

--tsquared

6491.
Hitler, Stalin, Mao,
Judas, Napoleon all
Feast on SPAM in Hell.

--tsquared

6492.
Squadrons of pink meat
Ready to attack bowels
Stand at attention

--Uncle Jay

6493.
See the bluish can
See white-laced pink stuff inside
I dream in color

--Uncle Jay

6494.
My lubricant's gone
And I can't use Vaseline
So I'll use SPAM gel

--Uncle Jay

6495.
Have you ever seen
A cat hack up a fur ball?
That's me eating SPAM.

--Uncle Jay

6496.
A dog sees a dog
One gives the other a tip
Do not eat SPAM scraps

--Uncle Jay

6497.
Just like chewing gum
Your intestines won't digest
If you swallow SPAM

--Uncle Jay

6498.
Homer Simpson drooled.
"SPAM," he said contentedly.
"Better than donuts."

--Uncle Jay

6499.
SPAM for President?
What cannot make a good lunch
Shouldn't run countries.

--Uncle Jay

6500.
The meat makes you fat
Salt makes you retain water
You turn into SPAM

--Uncle Jay