SPAM Haiku 13101-13200

Move backwards to Numbers 13001-13100.

13101.
The loving parent
Who spares their children from SPAM
Need to little more

--mmarschall, books@booksforyou.com

13102.
I do not eat SPAM
It really does frighten me
I will keep to that

--Anonymous

13103.
SPAM speaks to the world
In that can, under our skin
It's all just pink meat

--dr. soo dho nimh

13104.
What if Guv Dubya
Encounters SPAM in Japan?
More Bushusuru?

--dr. soo dho nimhno compassionate conservatives here!

13105.
Train full of live stock
derails. Hormel buys dead car-
go cheap. SPAM is born.

--Tbone4

13106.
Hormel employee
dilemma: 401K,
or free SPAM for life?

--Tbone4

13107.
Strange but you would think
Boca burger erections
Would replace pink SPAM.

--PETA PETA veggie burger eater, happycarrot@pissa.com

13108.
Gelatinous ca-
rapace yielding amber hue.
Plebian paté

--Basho got nothing on me

13109.
SPAM echo burning
Acid reflux disease...Burp!
Ate my navel ring.

--Glaxo-Welcomes , you pain and money.

13110.
Sliding out of tin
Sounds of jellied cranberries
Dog runs to kitchen

--Ward, cward@sprint.ca

13111.
I wander the hills
Seeking out the pink SPAM plant--
But the sign says CLOSED.

--Jess U. Waitnsee, Poco Loco WV

13112.
Eating SPAM all day
Helps quality assurance
Of porky software

--Rick Spamsen

13113.
Hawaiians eat more
SPAM than anyone else does
Aloha soooey!

--dr. soo dho nimh

13114.
South Seas folks treat SPAM
As a real delicacy
Are they cool, or what?

--dr. soo dho nimh

13115.
What the hell is it
This SPAM meat you write about--
You chicken chokers.

--Barney Frank, but not very.

13116.
SPAM on July 4th
It's the American way
Fireworks out your butt

--Have a 5th on the 4th, Ted Kennedy...Then to the car wash.

13117.
SPAM prevents wedgies
Just stuff it in your butt crack--
Then serve to Grandma.

--Grandma's Li'l Darling, He he he heee!

13118.
God bless Grandma Jones
She's the one that fed us SPAM--
Now we don't visit.

--Grandma's Li'l Darling

13119.
Grandma warmed our SPAM
In her red flannel drawers--
Is SPAM made of fish?

--Grandma's Lil Darling

13120.
Chicken monkey SPAM
Chicken chicken monkey SPAM
Monkey monkey SPAM

--Chicken Monkey Chicken, cmc@monkey.chicken

13121.
the yellow Jell-O
outside all around like dew
on still, freckled snail

--bartek

13122.
I saw a blue can
with a wet pink meat inside.
What strange beast is this???

--Tony, smoxreen@aol.com

13123.
A fried SPAM sandwich
White bread, lettuce, and mayo--
Fifties childhood lunch

--dr. soo dho nimh

13124.
SPAM flab on her butt
SPAM spunk drooling down her chins--
NAAFA, I'm in love.

--Hiram Phirum

13125.
Under the pine tree
Mr. Badger and Miss Fox--
They aren't eating SPAM.

--Grasshopper

13126.
History repeats
SPAM must be history too--
It is at my house.

--The Happy Banana

13127.
Here in the Midwest
The Heartland's heart is pink SPAM--
It needs a bypass.

--The Happy Banana

13128.
Down at the old "Y"
There's a strong odor of SPAM--
We go out to eat.

--Spacie Gracie, You can kiss my SPAM!

13129.
Sometimes I eat SPAM.
It's when I'm almost starving
Or else very drunk.

--Cathy, DonCathy2

13130.
SPAM knows how to swim.
We throw it in the water.
But we hope it sinks.

--Cathy, DonCathy2

13131.
After La Boheme,
Luciano Pavarotti
Eats SPAM Parmesan.

--Cathy, DonCathy2

13132.
Liver's worse than SPAM.
But I won't eat either one.
Pass the haggis, please.

--Cathy, DonCathy2

13133.
"Kids, Don't eat the SPAM.
Leave it there for your father.
We're getting divorced."

--cathy, DonCathy2

13134.
"Father, I have sinned.
Haven't been to church in years."
"Eat ten cans of SPAM."

--cathy, DonCathy2

13135.
SPAM in summer's heat
Sensuous, slimy, stinky--
My kind of health food.

--Hank E. Jama, hej@aonet.com

13136.
SPAM in the nineties
All it ever was and more--
Prime rib for base heads.

--Clarence Turner, Ny., Ny.

13137.
It's Saint Patrick's Day!
Time for corned SPAM and cabbage.
Get the bagpipes out.

--Cathy, DonCathy2@aol.com

13138.
I'd walk a million
Miles for one of your smiles, my
SPAAA--AAAA--AAA--AAAM--MY

--Cathy, DonCathy2@AOL.com

13139.
Pig jelly and grease
Pink as the Pepto I'll need--
When I eat mom's SPAM.

--Harry Uppinwaite, Blokeshire, UK

13140.
In the Home Eck! class
Jennifer discovered SPAM--
Stuck to her panties.

--Bob, Jennifer's Friend

13141.
Baptists and witches
And old boy son's of bitches
Munch a lunch of SPAM.

--Anonymous

13142.
Did Shakespeare eat SPAM?
No! And he wrote a load of crap.
SPAM eaters have IT.

--Steven

13143.
Damn plane going down
Faster than this can of SPAM
I smuggled on board

--Steven

13144.
Warm SPAM up my butt.
I don't know how it got there
But I'm so happy.

--Steven

13145.
On your Jig and Pig
Tie on a chunk of pink SPAM.
Slaughter them Black Bass.

--Fishing Tip #001, Jimmy with the bed pan haircut

13146.
Earn money at home
Carving saints out of pink SPAM--
Don't eat the prophets.

--Work p/t for our Roman Pope, Earn your way out of purgatory.

13147.
Try new "Chicken SPAM"
The hot summer Spike Lee hit--
Vegans love it too.

--Big Jim Gethers, burp@pinkpuke.com

13148.
Screaming Phil's screaming
Cause his SPAM is zipper-locked
While he wears mittens.

--Mittens the cat, that is.

13149.
I buried a can
Of Saint SPAM in my garden--
Keeps away homeless.

--City Dweller

13150.
Leaky can of SPAM
Sits on the shelf, stares, and drools
Watching me undress.

--Spacie Gracie, You can kiss my Spam!

13151.
Suppositories
Grey sticks of what once was SPAM--
At your Wal-Mart store.

--Monica Dipdit, and old Bildo lipped it.

13152.
SPAM penile implants
They do work qite well you know--
*Avoid all pig farms.

--Porcine Errectus, Could wreck you too!

13153.
BLUE can and RED SPAM
WHITE is the mold that surrounds--
Have a Happy 4th.

--MASS, Mothers Against Spam Suckers

13154.
Feeling blue and down
Your shorts Hunnie is that SPAM--
Or are you boosting?

--Henry Hogskiss, Da Bronx Rulz!

13155.
Mother baked her SPAM
Stood too close to the barbie--
Smell the hair burning?

--Deke's Mama

13156.
If ever I loved
Hillary would be the one--
She can lick my SPAM.

--Spacie Gracie, You can kiss my Spam!

13157.
In the land of SPAM
Everyone has Hershey sqirts--
And brown jockey shorts.

--Charmin, just Charmin

13158.
SPAM in solitude
Sits in the can and it waits
I too sit and wait

--Kay O'Pectate, WV land of world class outhouses.

13159.
Ding Dongs SPAM sandwich
My every day lunch of choice
And I read SPAMku

--Harold Parker, Hp111@handinet.com

13160.
SPAM the toxic meat
It killed the Three Little Pigs--
And The Big Bad Wolf.

--Minerva Hotchkiss, Crossed Lanes WV

13161.
SPAM for furry beast
Prowls in yard for nature's act
Cat calls out for more

--J.P. Namsol

13162.
Violent murder
Dispose of the evidence
Free SPAM for the Poor

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13163.
Blue death from above
Street resembles slaughterhouse
Dread rain of SPAM cans

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13164.
SPAM for all my meals
Mountainous pile of blue cans
Fuck I'm sick of SPAM

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13165.
Allegedly pork
In Iran they don't eat SPAM
Damn lucky Muslims

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13166.
It's pink in color
They tell us that SPAM is pork
Don't believe a word

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13167.
A SPAM-baited hook
Was on the end of my line
Didn't catch a thing

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13168.
Red tomato slice
White bread and Blue can of SPAM
Fourth of July lunch!!!

--dr. soo dho nimh

13169.
Early settlers had
Many hardships to live through
With no SPAM to help.

--dr. soo dho nimh

13170.
They had a SPAM toss
Big chunks laying on the ground
Dog sniffed, turned away.

--dr. soo dho nimh

13171.
Caustic ass-ed rains
The gods must have eaten SPAM--
And can't find St. John.

--Harold Angels

13172.
Futuristic chess--
The stakes are a can of SPAM!
Let the Wookie win.

--Scott E. Haley, sco11@aol.com

13173.
I have never tried
SPAM like gelatinous pink
The blue tin beckons

--Basho's got EVERYTHING on me...., Aussie_no_Spam@yet_to_catch_on.au

13174.
great mouthfuls of SPAM
were often consumed by us--
which made us throw up.

--dave, Davet_51@webtv.net

13175.
For the love of SPAM,
a blond Germanic girl is
whispering SÜLZE.

--Aks, kschwarz@zfn.uni-bremen.de

13176.
Pink and glistening
The SPAM loaf exudes jelly
And so I throw up

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13177.
Hated luncheon meat
It shakes as if in panic
As my boot descends

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13178.
A falling SPAM loaf
My foot rises to meet it
A pink explosion

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13179.
SPAM slides down my throat
My oesophagus corrodes
Suicide by SPAM

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13180.
Silo will eat SPAM
He'll eat it three times a day
Silo's a sick man

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13181.
The fridge door opens
Nothing in there except SPAM
I run off screaming

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13182.
Biting into SPAM
My body cannot take this
I go ballistic

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13183.
Cops killed in action
Mysteriously vanish
Returning as SPAM

--The Pied Viper, thepiedviper@hotmail.com

13184.
My death awaits me
In a blue and yellow can
I bite and smile

--Steve Kleinvehn, stevek@ncsa.uiuc.edu

13185.
War tears through Europe
Scientists work night and day
We perfect SPAM first

--Gian, GLuigiD@aol.com

13186.
SPAM makes your boobs big
Makes 'em stand up and say "HI!"
(When you stuff your bra)

--Spacie Gracie, You can kiss my Spam!

13187.
Edible nipples
Pasties made out of pink SPAM
For not-so-true blondes.

--Spacie Gracie, You can kiss my Spam!

13188.
I lived on canned SPAM
Got lei'd twice every day
While on Hawaii.

--Spacie Gracie, You can kiss my Spam!

13189.
Sarah and Philip
Betcha they're a nice couple--
Of low life SPAMmers.

--Spacie Gracie, You can kiss my Spam!

13190.
SPAM dingleberries
Falling and attracting flies--
No more boxer shorts.

--Gringo

13191.
Hound dog Blue ate SPAM
Chased his tail and screwed himself--
Right into the ground.

--Gary Mebach, twooldvirginny.com

13192.
Robins won't eat SPAM.
I put it outside for them,
But they prefer worms.

--Cathy, DonCathy2@aol.com

13193.
What's this awful stuff?
I can't stand the sight of it.
Get it out of here.

--Cathy, DonCathy2@AOL.com

13194.
There's SPAM in my shoes.
It makes me an inch taller.
But dogs follow me...

--Cathy, DonCathy2@AOL.com

13195.
Mother took the SPAM
And she fed it to the hogs.
Cannibalism.

--Cathy, DonCathy2@aol.com

13196.
This is SPAM Haiku.
It's three lines, 5-7-5.
What a waste of time!

--Cathy, DonCathy2@aol.com

13197.
And to my dear son
Who never came to see me,
I leave all my SPAM.

--Cathy, DonCathy2@aol.com

13198.
This is paradise.
You and I in this garden.
Adam, want some SPAM?

--Cathy, DonCathy2

13199.
SPAM stewing on stove
Tenderized by white wigglies--
Which now pass for rice.

--Vermont Home Cooking, Skiers Welcome All You Can Eat!

13200.
In my dear childhood
When The Bronx was kick-ass great--
Bronx Cheers were anal.

--Louie Da Nose