Move backwards to Numbers 2601-2700.
2701.
If you suck a SPAM
Through a straw you can eat it
Just like spaghetti.
--Mike O'Connor (K.M.O'Connor), mickman@intonet.co.uk2702.
--rlowery@apollo.oursc.k12.ar.us
SPAM! It is bad! Yes!
Bad SPAM! Sit in the corner!
Bad, bad, bad SPAM. Bad.
2703.
--Reber Clark, Rebermuse@aol.com
Licking my fingers,
Giggling with insane delight,
I consumed my SPAM.
2704.
--Reber Clark, Rebermuse@aol.com
As Pam mapped her SPAM,
A past map of SPAM was cast
Beneath her glazed eyes.
2705.
--Reber Clark, Rebermuse@aol.com
Little letters four:
"Ess pee ay em," like a song,
Burble in my ear.
2706.
--doug holtzman, dholtzma@icos.com
On rice and kimchi
In a bed of lettuce leaf
SPAM, misunderstood
2707.
--Mike O'Connor (K.M.O'Connor), mickman@intonet.co.uk
Right. I sucked the SPAM
Through a straw, then I blew. Pink
Worms are everywhere!
2708.
--Peter Berman, berman@math.brown.edu
"Roll with the changes,"
Advised REO. And yet
SPAM outlived that band.
2709.
--Peter Berman, berman@math.brown.edu
Semper Porcinus,
Always Meaty--the motto
Of the soldier's lunch.
2710.
--Mike O'Connor (K.M.O'Connor), mickman@intonet.co.uk
Infinite darkness.
Centered, a white plate with pink
Obelisk. Salt dreams.
2711.
--J. B. Zimmerman
Whitish speckled pink
Nature cringes from its place
The loaf stands unbowed
2712.
--Trevor Washington
spam spam spam spam spam
spam spam baked beans and spam spam
spam eggs sausage spam
2713.
--Mike O'Connor (K.M.O'Connor), mickman@intonet.co.uk
Silver is the moon.
The sun at dawn gleams SPAM-glow.
The Pink Goddess smiles.
2714.
--Daren Chapin, chapin@sbcm.com
Here's one for Christo:
Surround small islands with SPAM
Wide pink porcine rings
2715.
--Daren Chapin, chapin@sbcm.com
The Great Wall of SPAM
Giant pink array of food
Visible from space
2716.
--Daren Chapin, chapin@sbcm.com
Night before Christmas
Left Santa some milk and SPAM
Coal in my stocking
2717.
--Mike O'Connor (K.M.O'Connor), mickman@intonet.co.uk
Benevolent SPAM.
Absorb me in your pink soul.
Transcendent haven.
2718.
--Anonymous
Turn silver SPAM key
Dump blue box, slice pink glazed meat
Fry 'em up, serve hot
2719.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
Athens band Dayroom
sings SPAM, "imitation meat
conglomeration."
2720.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
An old Altoids tin:
handy carrying case for
a thick slice of SPAM.
2721.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
"Wake up, time to die,"
says android, holding SPAM near
the blade runner's mouth.
2722.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
Arnold: "I'll be back."
Drives SPAM truck into building.
The SPAMinator!
2723.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
Rhett Butler says to
wife Scarlett, "Frankly my dear,
I don't give a SPAM!"
2724.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
"You killed my father!"
says Luke. "No," says Darth Vader,
"he ate SPAM!" Luke screams.
2725.
--"James Elroy" O'Connor
Ah, SPAM of my de-
Light that knows no wain, this SPAM
Rises time again.
2726.
--Mike O'Connor (K.M.O'Connor), mickman@intonet.co.uk
Take an old SPAM loaf.
No! Put it back again, friend.
I feel compassion.
2727.
--Martin Booda, booda@datasync.com
The Dustman comes round,
Recycles old haiku like
Recycled pork loaf.
2728.
--Martin Booda, booda@datasync.com
She's lump, she's lump, she's
In my head. This has to be
A song about SPAM.
2729.
--El Supremo Number One Guy, rlowery@apollo.oursc.k12.ar.us
SPAM is so evil!
It can kill with its fatty,
oozing, slimy gel!
2730.
--El Supremo Number One Guy, rlowery@apollo.oursc.k12.ar.us
SPAM, SPAM, the greatest
fruit, is so, so sweet on toast.
With side of bacon.
2731.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
Pat Buchanan says,
"Build 40-foot wall of SPAM
to keep out wetbacks!"
2732.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
"Evolution wrong,"
exclaims Pat. "Can't explain SPAM!"
But who would want to?
2733.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
"Flat tax makes you rich,
all the SPAM you can eat! YUM!"
Forbes drops out of race.
2734.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
Military men
and criminals all ate SPAM.
Cause and effect? Hmmm.
2735.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
Bob Dole cracks a smile.
Did Elizabeth fry him
some SPAM this morning?
2736.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
Republican SPAM:
It's the same old pork in a
fancier new can.
2737.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
"Read my lips," said George,
"No new SPAM taxes!" Next prez:
Clinton. No surprise.
2738.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
On the World Wide Web,
I looked for a SPAM fan page.
"404 Not Found."
2739.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
Harry Truman said,
"The buck stops here." But the SPAM?
You could pass that on.
2740.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
So, Mr. Christian,
You men will not eat the SPAM?
This is mutiny!
2741.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
Python song: "Every
SPAM Is Sacred." Wait. I think
That was something else.
2742.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
David Letterman
Crushed SPAM with hydraulic press.
Ratings went way up.
2743.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
Marlon Brando used
SPAM in place of butter in
"Last Tango in Pork."
2744.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
General Motors
Comes out with SPAM-powered car.
Total sales: Zero.
2745.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
Comedy Central
Cancelled MST3K.
Let's all mail them SPAM!
2746.
--Bob Roberds, broberds@ix.netcom.com
When the Beastie Boys
Eat SPAM in a video,
Tipper Gore goes nuts.
2747.
--El Supremo Number One Guy, rlowery@apollo.oursc.k12.ar.us
Oh, yes, SPAM can sing.
Oh, and of course, SPAM can dance.
Get down with some SPAM!
2748.
--El Supremo Number One Guy, rlowery@apollo.oursc.k12.ar.us
SPAM is so cheesy.
I can spread it on crackers.
And also on bread.
2749.
--El Supremo Number One Guy, rlowery@apollo.oursc.k12.ar.us
Oh, so spreadable,
I can put it on my car.
Makes it run better.
2750.
--El Supremo Number One Guy, rlowery@apollo.oursc.k12.ar.us
I am in trouble.
My parents caught me with SPAM!
Forever grounded!
2751.
--El Supremo Number One Guy, rlowery@apollo.oursc.k12.ar.us
A science project.
I made an evil monster.
It is made of SPAM.
2752.
--El Supremo Number One Guy, rlowery@apollo.oursc.k12.ar.us
SPAM is oh so good!
The best kind of meat product!
Boy, I CAN lie good!
2753.
--El Supremo Number One Guy, rlowery@apollo.oursc.k12.ar.us
Oh, meat by-product,
glistening in yellow sun,
bugging no one there.
2754.
--El Supremo Number One Guy, rlowery@apollo.oursc.k12.ar.us
Have you ever seen
a SPAM centerfold before?
It is naked SPAM!
2755.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
Twenty-eight-hundred,
Who dares open every one?
They all look the same.
2756.
--Andy Dustman, andy@neptune.chem.uga.edu
Oops! This one's empty.
I find a short note inside:
"Bite me! SPAM happens!"
2757.
--Jenny Moon, moon@leland.stanford.edu
They do not serve SPAM
In my college dining hall
And, oh yes, nature.
2758.
--Pete and Jeremy
ecto-orgasmic
spam it inside me big boy
it's gelatinous
2759.
--Blasphemous Pete
Put it in your mouth,
it's salty chewy goodness
at The Last Supper.
2760.
--Anonymous
I reveal my meat
pink and hard, old meaty foods.
Four inches of SPAM.
2761.
--Garth Silberstein, sgsilberstein@ucdavis.edu, and Ray Wooliever, pcwooliever@ucdavis.edu
"Who are these people
who eat SPAM?" asked Jerry S.
Lame comedy bit.
2762.
--Dale Wisely, dwisely@msn.com
On grocery shelves,
A brand new product: SPAM Spread
Same crap, new texture
2763.
--Dale Wisely, dwisely@msn.com
Astronauts drink Tang
But have to draw line somewhere:
"Ain't flying with SPAM."
2764.
--Dale Wisely, dwisely@msn.com
All faiths hold to this
theological maxim:
No SPAM in Heaven
2765.
--Dale Wisely, dwisely@msn.com
If one refers to
SPAM and Hell in same sentence,
One is redundant
2766.
--Steve Taylor, staylor@primenet.com
SPAM on the table
All winter, summer, and fall
How I love the spring!
2767.
--Hormel spokeswoman
We know it's [Spamku's]
out there and we don't neces-
sarily like it.
2768.
--Hormel spokeswoman
I don't understand
what it is all about, this
[SPAM] haiku business.
2769.
--Derek, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM is very good.
It smells like honey, yummy.
SPAM is delicious.
2770.
--Westley, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM is not a treat.
Some people call it a meat.
I could not say that.
2771.
--Leah, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM.
SPAM is very tasty, yes.
SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM.
2772.
--Stephanie, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, SPAM, I love SPAM.
SPAM's ham in a can, it is.
SPAM, SPAM, I love SPAM.
2773.
--Trey, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM is very good.
SPAM is wig-gl-y and good.
SPAM comes in a can.
2774.
--Megean, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, SPAM, yuck, yuck, yuck!
You look, smell, and taste so weird.
SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, yuck.
2775.
--Rory, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, SPAM in a can.
Oh, so yucky in my hand.
I don't like that SPAM.
2776.
--Rory, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
No, I don't want SPAM.
I like ham, but not that SPAM.
Not that SPAM for me.
2777.
--Jonathan, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM is delicious.
SPAM makes me drool like a pig.
Slap it on a plate!
2778.
--Raeann, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
When I go to sleep
I dream about tasty SPAM.
I can't get enough.
2779.
--Ryan M., martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM is delicious.
SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, I crave it.
SPAM, SPAM in a can.
2780.
--Brian, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, oh, yummy SPAM.
Hot SPAM, cold SPAM, give me SPAM.
SPAM, oh, give me SPAM.
2781.
--Michael, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, SPAM, it's yellow.
SPAM, SPAM, it feels like Jell-O.
Like a good fellow.
2782.
--Robert, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM in a can, yum!
SPAM tastes like ham in a can.
SPAM is a good thing.
2783.
--Robert, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
Mom, please go buy SPAM.
SPAM sure is a good product.
In Aisle Three, mommy!
2784.
--Marco, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM makes a great meal
With a wonderful feeling.
SPAM is the best meal.
2785.
--Lori, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, SPAM so tasty.
It looks weird, but it is good.
SPAM so, so tasty.
2786.
--Kim A., martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, SPAM, go away!
SPAM, I don't like you, you stink.
SPAM, SPAM, go away.
2787.
--Stephen, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
Yummy, yummy SPAM.
When I heat it, I pop up.
Yummy, yummy SPAM.
2788.
--Tyler, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, lamb, gooey fat.
Looks like dog food, but it's fat.
I crave for more SPAM.
2789.
--Kristina, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM is great to eat.
Better when it's hot, not cold.
Yummy, yummy SPAM.
2790.
--Katie, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
Hey, do you like SPAM?
Oh! I just love my own SPAM.
Come out and taste it.
2791.
--Jessica, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, SPAM, it is pork.
Oh, it's so good you want more.
Pass some more to me.
2792.
--Ryan C., martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM is a good ham.
A good ham is a good man.
A good man and ham.
2793.
--Sean, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, SPAM is so good.
Makes me feel like Robin Hood.
It tastes very good.
2794.
--Kristen, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
SPAM, SPAM, I love it.
SPAM is so very good stuff.
I wish SPAM was mine.
2795.
--Brett, martinm@svusd.k12.ca.us
Yum, yum, in my tum.
More, more, more, more, more, and more.
Want SPAM again, man.
2796.
--Larry Kunz
Pink, greasy meat cube
Quivering there on my plate.
How can I eat thee?
2797.
--Larry Kunz
Kitchen gallery:
An original Hormel!
Not breakfast; pure art.
2798.
--zbaird@cjnetworks.com
Wise Buddha the great
Taught everything is but one.
SPAM tests the faithful.
2799.
--Joon Moon, joonmoon@aol.com
Piggy soul has gone
To heaven, leaving on earth
Heavenly taste--SPAM
2800.
--R. Chang and J. Finley, Chicago
O beauteous SPAM
Couldst thou be more delicious?
Yes. On the way out.