7501.
I'M BORED AT LUNCHTIME
I THINK I'LL WRITE A SPAM RHYME
FORGET IT, I CAN'T
--ISF
7502.
ANOTHER SPAMKU
OR TWO OR THREE OR TWENTY
LOVE ABOUNDS IN YOU
--ISF
7503.
SPAM IN THE MORNING
SPAM RIGHT BEFORE MY BEDTIME
SPAM NIGHTMARE FOR SURE
--ISF
7504.
UNCONTROLLABLE
SPAM URGES, I MUST HAVE MORE
A SUCKER FOR LIFE
--ISF
7505.
GOURMET TREAT INSIDE
THE GELATINOUS PINK MASS
WOLFGANG PUCK AGREES
--ISF
7506.
HOW I DO THRIVE ON
PINK STUFF THAT LASTS FOR EONS
I'M A SPAM ZOMBIE
--ISF
7507.
SPAM IS MADE UP OF
SNIPS AND SNAILS AND PIGGY TAILS
THAT'S WHAT SPAM'S MADE OF
--ISF
7508.
OL' CONFUCIUS SAY
YOU OPEN SPAM CAN WITH KEY
NOT GOOD THING TO DO
--ISF
7509.
GOLLY GEE, BATMAN
GOTHAM CITY'S IN A FIX
SPAM TO THE RESCUE
--ISF
7510.
ENOUGH OF HAIKU
NEED TO GET BACK TO MY LIFE
FOND FAREWELL TO SPAM
--ISF
7511.
Marvelous, pink SPAM.
Gelatinous forever.
The thought makes me barf.
--Steve Amato
7512.
Pink cube of swine parts.
Almighty and immortal.
SPAM is as SPAM was.
--Anonymous
7513.
Great Wall of China
built piece by piece with SPAM bricks.
Who could have known it?
--Anonymous
7514.
Fried SPAM with fried egg,
Dave likes it! Cholesterol
death is imminent.
--The Analog Kid, jeffery.p.scharn@state.or.us
7515.
Essence of process
In a red, white, and blue can
Americana
--Timothy Brandis
7516.
Jeff Dahmer in jail.
He was fed some SPAM and said,
"How can you eat this?"
--Anonymous
7517.
Elvis Costello
and the Attractions' new disc:
All This Useless SPAM
--Anonymous
7518.
If SPAM is Art then
never has Artsy-Fartsy
been any truer.
--Bob City
7519.
Monkey Spanking Boy
Repeat SPAM meat abuser
Caught with his pants down
--son of MSB
7520.
Monkey Spanking Boy
Seeking mercy from the judge
Blames it all on SPAM
--son of MSB
7521.
Monkey Spanking Boy
"Baliff, whack his pee pee! He's
Guilty!" cries the judge
--son of MSB
7522.
I drink Yoo-hoo now
Read your damn spamku archive
Have to clean keyboard
--Paul E. King, paul.king@nashville.com
7523.
Fishing? Use SPAM as
Bait. Works just like dynamite
But not as noisy...
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7524.
Hail SPAM! Pork nectar
King of the pork by-products
Tail, snout, hoof, and guts.
--beppo
7525.
Marching band eats SPAM.
During halftime the band blows
A few pink sour notes.
--Bob City
7526.
blind man opens a
spam can and takes a big whiff
rejects as dog food
--dennis K
7527.
Nazi: "Ve'll make you
Sqveal like a pig!" SPAM: "Sorry--
Don't do impressions..."
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7528.
UK company
Plans to print upside down maps:
Hormel starts lawsuit.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7529.
SPAM may have critics
But there's one good thing: at least
It's dolphin-friendly.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7530.
MOSES READ ALOUD
THE ELEVENTH COMMANDMENT
"THOU SHALT NOT EAT SPAM!"
--ISF
7531.
SPAM is everywhere!
Alas, I see the world through
pink-colored glasses.
--Jonathan Campbell, adept@io.com
7532.
the plate opens wide
receives gelatinous mass
the meaning of life
--Lee Bagz, lee_baggett@hotmail.com
7533.
SPAM cans speak to me,
They order me to murder:
"I am Son of SPAM!!"
--Anonymous
7534.
Have a can of SPAM
Had it for seven years now
Still won't eat that crap
--Lief Codianni, lcodiann@clas.suffolk.edu
7535.
In the big blue can
Pinkest substance in the land
Hormel fresh packed SPAM
--Lief Codianni, lcodiann@clas.suffolk.edu
7536.
cold, gelatinous
a perfect cube of pink goo
good for kinky sex!
--Allison L. and Olin S., adlittle@unity.ncsu.edu
7537.
My dogs licks her butt
She does hunt roaches and bugs
But she won't eat SPAM
--Zoe and Kay
7538.
SPAM is the greatest
stuff on the planet Earth, it
is mystery meat.
--Jaguar, saysonj@usa.net
7539.
Being on Death Row
Waiting to die is tough, BUT
When they serve SPAM--Man!
--Anonymous
7540.
take jelly from can
pour into ice cube tray, freeze:
refreshing spam pops!
--Michael Sheinbaum, steelydan@onix.com
7541.
hypnotize the spam
make it cluck like a chicken;
lower fat content
--Michael Sheinbaum, steelydan@onix.com
7542.
Starving and helpless
A woman offers him SPAM
Starving, not stupid
--spam master Brady
7543.
Specially Prepared
Agglutinated Morsels:
So Pure And Meaty!
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7544.
I am the SPAM Man
I don't like green eggs and ham
SPAM SPAM... oh, YES! SPAM!
--Funky Mama, Funky@mail.wm.edu
7545.
Inspiration failed
Me; so I bought a can of
SPAM... still no joy... (sigh)
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7546.
Five SPAMku a day?
I still won't catch SHAM before
They take me away...
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7547.
Stone walls do not a
Prison make but SPAM makes a
Lovely pin cushion.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7548.
He's feeling better
Celebration feast of SPAM
Alien escapes
--Chris Dunlop, chris@masonbruce.com
7549.
What the dogs won't eat
we ship in large quantities
to Americans.
--Hunter Elenbaas
7550.
Pulchritudinous
Pulverized prime pork pieces
Providing pleasure.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7551.
Midday SPAMboree
On Wall Street: thousands decide
That lunch is for wimps.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7552.
South Pacific: A
Musical featuring SPAM
Enchanted Ev'ning.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7553.
Pig-headed? Me? All
Right... I'm gonna wash that SPAM
Right out of my hair...
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7554.
Ford's SPAM production
Line: any color you like
As long as it's pink.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7555.
Blind men cry for SPAM
Deeds recite "The Wounded Cow":
"Why am I deaf too?!"
--Todd Gifford, giff6437@tiger.hsc.edu
7556.
The monitors oink?
The computers have turned pink?
I've spammed the network!
--Anonymous
7557.
Eyes, ears, tails, innards
Glisten in the ice-box light
Pinkish porcine cube
--Pele Joker, pejoke@aol.com
7558.
SPAM flavored Jell-O
Spamagothcies should be made
SPAM man is real neat
--Sean
7559.
A congressman raves:
"Two cans of SPAM in each home!"
He becomes impeached.
--Qwerty
7560.
Some like to eat it.
If it didn't look like
Pink barf on my plate.
--Stormy, bud.weisser@sympatico.ca
7561.
SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM
SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM
(minimal SPAMku)
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7562.
"Scientists clone pigs
From prehistoric SPAM cans":
Jurassic Pork 2.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7563.
Shall I compare thee
To a summer's day? Thou art
More rainy Monday...
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7564.
Di's car is a wreck.
Paparazzi climb on it.
No...they're from Hormel.
--Martin H.Booda, booda@datasync.com
7565.
Di's eternal now.
What was left, scraped off the road,
Put in neat blue tins.
--Martin H.Booda, booda@datasync.com
7566.
SPAM sent to Palace.
Charles sits to feast upon a
Meal fit for a Prince.
--Martin H.Booda, booda@datasync.com
7567.
Elizabeth burps.
"Well," she says, "that Diana
Always had good taste.
--Martin H.Booda, booda@datasync.com
7568.
Shoveling, yum, yum,
Great taste pork products, yum, yum,
Makes me want to crap.
--Homer-Sexual, touch.me.feel.me.break.me.spam.me.com
7569.
open me, take me
touch me, break me, make me hot
so i'm good to eat
--Homer-Sexual, touch.me.feel.me.break.me.spam.me.com
7570.
Pristine pork pieces...
So smooth, sensuous, shiny...
Perfectly piggy!
--janie applecheeks, pphhrogg@communique.net
7571.
Old, oily oinker...
Imagine it in a can.
NOW you understand!
--janie applecheeks, pphhrogg@communique.net
7572.
Ice, sugar, and SPAM....
Recipe for SPAM glacé.
Unbelievable!!!
--janie applecheeks, pphhrogg@communique.net
7573.
Where do I belong?
Only the SPAM Goddess knows.
Curing meatlessness...
--Theo, davejack@citynet.net
7574.
spamkuer geoff holme
must have eaten far too much
take away his key
--Anonymous
7575.
I am Sam, Sam I
am. Do you like green eggs and
SPAM? No. Fuck off, Sam.
--Elbert Manabu Shitamoto
7576.
I pledge allegiance
to the SPAM of the Hormel
Foods Corporation.
--Elbert Manabu Shitamoto
7577.
Punk Rock Memories:
Slamming SPAM on genitals,
lost two testicles.
--Elbert Manabu Shitamoto
7578.
In prison, it is
SPAM--breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
Death penalty, please!
--Elbert Manabu Shitamoto
7579.
"Take two cans of SPAM
and call me in the morning."
He never woke up.
--Elbert Manabu Shitamoto
7580.
"Only supplies SPAM??
Houston, we have a problem.":
Apollo 13
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7581.
My girlfriend loves SPAM
Many a night spent smashing
Yummy, squishy SPAM
--MrCohaagen, cohaagen@usaor.net
7582.
Deprived of his SPAM
Man has been known to lash out
Give him his fake pork...
--MrCohaagen, cohaagen@usaor.net
7583.
SPAMBURGERs are good
My brother cannot eat them
In surgery now...
--MrCohaagen, cohaagen@usaor.net
7584.
SPAM is eternal
Forever shall it persist
It is the future!
--MrCohaagen, cohaagen@usaor.net
7585.
I'm a priest of SPAM
Rise, my loyal disciples
Worship the great meat!
--MrCohaagen, cohaagen@usaor.net
7586.
Concealing pink death
Cheery blue and yellow tin
Hello, arteries!
--Yobar, mchugh@bhil.com
7587.
Mysterious gel
Surrounds pink dog excrement
The essence of SPAM
--John V. I. Lennin
7588.
The small, blue can, ah!
A portable feast for one
Without taste or sense
--Deborah
7589.
1928:
Bacteria shun Fleming's
Week old Hormel ham.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7590.
Famous last words: "Hush,
Dear. Don't cause a fuss. I'll have
Your SPAM. I love it!"
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7591.
Hormel Foods builds home
For Native American:
Wigwam, thank you, SPAM.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7592.
SPAM may tempt Native
Americans but they still
Have reservations.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7593.
How I love that SPAM,
A food for all occasions.
Too bad I'm vegan.
--Stormy
7594.
Hormel breaks into
The kosher market with their
New product: SPALTBEEF.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7595.
Hectic job? Give thanks
That you don't work in Hormel's
Complaints Department.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7596.
What is the worst job
You've had? Taster in Hormel's
Quality Control.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com
7597.
We all love our SPAM
And our SPAM loves us all too
Kinda like Barney.
--MrCohaagen, cohaagen@usaor.net
7598.
My grandma ate SPAM.
She had schizoid embolisms.
Now hospitalized...
--MrCohaagen, cohaagen@usaor.net
7599.
SPAM holds such beauty...
You can't help but admire it.
Hypnotizing meat...
--MrCohaagen, cohaagen@usaor.net
7600.
I've seen the SPAM gods.
Pink-skinned beings of power...
Blessed with sacred SPAM!
--MrCohaagen, cohaagen@usaor.net