Go backwards to The SHAM's Tasty Picks (Part 5).
5129.
Cold steel in a pig.
Clean up the blood, cook the flesh:
A pig in cold steel.
5144.
I stare, it stares back.
I long to know its feelings.
It demurs. Lunch, then.
5172.
I stepped from shadows
Into the microwave glow
And watched SPAM rotate
5228.
SPAM, it's a short word
Takes a moment to say the
Monosyllable
5311.
Locked in room with SPAM
Try to pick lock with can's key
It snaps, I am doomed
5345.
A bulge in my jeans
"Is that SPAM in your pocket?"
I blush and say "Yes"
5365.
Simmer in saucepan
SPAM mixed with herbs and spices
Throw out meat, eat pan
5445.
Sitting on toilet
I think of the SPAM long gone
And SPAM yet to come
5488.
In the can of SPAM
A severed human finger
Pleasant texture change
5548.
Lived only to speak
The language of the loved loaf
Each tongue but a slice
5639.
In post-SPAM twilight
Chanting intestinal dirge
Summoning pink dung
5652.
SPAM comes creeping up
when you expect it the least
like, during a kiss.
5681.
My name REALLY sucks:
"Hammered Virgin" anagram,
SPAM turned into HAM.
5685.
I finished the SPAM
Last night, and today I feel
Pigs' eyes upon me.
5688.
Curious white dots
Are sprinkled like confetti
In a pork parade
5689.
SPAM smells so sexy.
A little behind the ears,
And I can date cops.
5704.
Arching, popping fat.
Mom is sick of mooching son.
Breakfast is ready!
5716.
She dressed a pink cube
to look like me, and ate it.
Now my shoulder hurts.
5759.
SPAM in my stomach,
Like a twenty-ton weight in
A light pastry shell.
5771.
In the thawing snow,
The can's blue corner peeps out
Like spring's first crocus.
5798.
A killer of pigs.
"A heart attack on a plate."
SPAM is sui-cide.
5802.
The beach picnic ends.
The sand blows, the naked SPAM
Puts on a tweed coat.
5818.
Veggie Hormel snack:
Spiced wheat germ, compressed in blocks--
But who will buy SPERM?
5822.
A slimy mollusk
Lacking only a pink shell
Escargodawful
5825.
Mother's rough finger
Stirs water into the Tang
And glazes the SPAM.
5879.
Trailer park wedding
A piñata, Schlitz, and SPAM
Vegas honeymoon
5931.
If meat is murder,
SPAM fried, in more ways than one,
is death warmed over.
Last modified: Thu Mar 20 16:59:20 GMT-0400 1997